Demonstrating Higher Value

The Pick Up Artist Episode 5 Review

In this episode, Mystery challenges the men to pick up “hired guns.” Hired guns are women who have been hired, strictly based on their looks. So to prepare them, Mystery takes them to a women’s charity auction, where they will be auctioning off themselves. The goal here is to tell a story that demonstrates higher value and a higher auction price.

To demonstrate higher value, you have to tell a story that subtly indicates your social status. These little hints are things that women listen to in order to determine if you are a healthy mate. Of course, you can use body language to convey these things but eventually, you are going to have to open your mouth.

Here is my take on all of the things that you should project in order to maximize attraction:

Being interesting
Being unpredictable
Having style
Not appearing needy
Being a good lover
Being funny
Capable of creating a connection
Being secure with yourself
Being trustworthy

Others can include:

Already having beautiful women in your life. If your ex-girlfriend was a hired gun, right there it tells them that you are capable of attaining an attractive woman.

Financial stability. Note that this is different than having a large amount of money. If you are stable in your life, that is all you need. Forget what anyone else thinks. There’s no need to flaunt your money, like others do. They’re just compensating for another area that they may lack in.

Being a protector. If you can tell a story that talks about how you saved your girlfriend or your close friends from some type of trouble (basically be the hero), that’s huge for you. Any woman would love to be around a guy that they know will make them feel safe and protected. A very attractive quality.

Being a leader among men. If you can show that people look to you for direction or that you just lead a life dependent on no one but you, that is also a strong, attractive quality.

I’ll leave it at that for now. I’ll have a video post of what a DHV story would sound like very soon (You’ll have to sign up for the exclusive access – also coming soon!).

Ok, back to your scheduled review.

So the guys pretty much embarrass themselves on stage, except for Greg. He actually told a good, genuine story. I think that moment told me that he should be the favorite to win this thing. But he needs to step up his game and not rely on just looks.

Long story short, Matt wins the auction with $850. What was his reward? He gets to have Tara by his side during the field test later on that night. Each reward just makes it easier and easier to pick up women. Unfortunately, every time someone gets a reward, they don’t know how to use it effectively.

In Mystery’s lesson on picking up hired guns, he says that it’s important to neg (give a playful insult) right away, then go right into demonstrating higher value (DHV). I think you can do this in most situations when you are dealing with really attractive women. It simply just gives off the vibe that you see and have been with attractive women before and her looks aren’t going be her selling point with you. Isn’t that what it’s about anyway? Finding a connection that goes deeper than physical attraction?

Anyway, Rian has his usual breakdown so his count is now up to 5. What a loser. I don’t understand why he is still around. I compared him to Prahdeep from the first season and that was a mistake on my part. Prahdeep had a much better learning curve.

Mystery finally brings them to the field test – a bikini fashion show. And the guys have to talk to the women of the show. Now considering what their progress has been over the course of the season and how attractive these women are, they have no chance.

I’m not going to get into the interactions this week because they were all terrible pretty much.

Greg hovered and creeped out the first two women. Then he talks to another girl and bores her to death.

Brian used a good opener and opened up a group of 7 people but fizzled in the conversation with his quirkiness. He then followed a couple of the women and creeped them out. Then he approaches another girl and pretty much insults her. She doesn’t like it and they all walk away. Terrible.

Mystery, what are you teaching them? This is a joke compared to last season. You have more people watching this now then last season and this is what you show them? You’re not helping your name at all. Nor are you helping the public perception what is a pick up artist.

Rian opened a set and failed. A woman did show interest but he couldn’t capitalize.

Matt froze, even when he was with Tara. I just get frustrated with these guys. Greg just won’t pull the trigger. He can get most women to be attracted to him and he is just too scared to take a risk and make a move.

Simeon talked to two women and was able to get a number from the woman who was talking to Matt and Rian and showed some interest to them.

Clear winner here is Simeon.

Elimination: This medallion is called Jera, which is the rune of success. You can read all about it here. But I just can’t believe that they eliminated Brian.

Brian??!?!?! I mean, it makes sense because he was never able to draw attraction from anyone, but man, if you are going to eliminate him and he’s the most socially apt out of the group, how could you keep any of the other guys?

Now that the show has gotten rid of the Asians, now I need to find a new favorite. This one I’ll have to think about.

Am I A Pick Up Artist?

As I am on the awesome Bolt Bus headed to NYC for an event, I figured I would take the time to address something that has come up a lot over the past several weeks. Ever since I have started Project Infinity, I have always been excited about telling people what I do. I am totally passionate about it and absolutely love the idea of being able to help people improve their lives in any way possible. Because I mostly cover dating and building self-confidence, people tend to ask me questions like, “So you know how to pick up women, huh?” “So are you a player or some type of pick up artist?” My favorite by far is, “So you’re telling me that you can get any girl in here?” Sometimes, it bothers me because that’s not at all the point of me doing any of this. Sure, I’d like to be better at attracting beautiful women and I think it’s a very important thing to learn in life because it builds confidence and finding women to connect with is a difficult thing to find these days, but the idea of being seen as a pick up artist and how it is viewed in the public really bothered me.

When you think of a pick up artist, you will automatically think of Mystery, who is a tall, skinny fellow who wears things like a huge top hat, goggles, a feather boa and black fingernails. He is such a stand out, it’s crazy – but it works for him and he’s had amazing success in his life. Then you think about how some of these other guys that just seduce women into having sex with them and it can definitely put off any woman who knows this – understandably so.

So I decided to give people who interact with me a different approach to what they think is pick up. After talking with me, they finally understand what I do and how it’s different than the usual pick up artist. When I go out, I end up meeting a lot of people. I love meeting people. Socializing is my thing. I am always living in the moment and if I sense there may be a connection with another woman, then I’ll go after it – but it’s never planned these days. For me, it’s better not to plan these kinds of things because I will appreciate the moment, the interaction and the person more – as we all should do. Plus, you never know who you will meet that night. It could be someone that can change your life forever.

But then, I started to hear people still use the term pick up artist when they think of me and they would always explain, “I know you’re not one of “those guys.” I understand what you do and it’s changed my perception of who a pick up artist is.” I find that to be great but you’d still call me one? Am I really a pick up artist?

I got on my computer and tried to find the best definition of a pick up artist online and I came across the best one so far yesterday. It was so good that it inspired me to write this. It’s from Seduction Nation and the article can be read here. But here is their interpretation of what a pick up artist is.

“A pick up artist (PUA) is somebody that is able to meet and attract women with ease. They can mingle seamlessly in any situation, and leave almost any woman dying for his attention.”

The next line is what struck me.

“Contrary to what you may believe, anybody is capable of this – it just takes the proper use of [seduction] techniques combined with a cool confidence that only comes with experience.”

You hear that? Anyone is capable of this! You just have to go out there and work toward it. But I digress…

So based on that definition above, I would have to say, “Yes, I am a pick up artist.” But I would change it a little bit, replacing women with people. I am great at meeting and attracting people to me. I’m pretty cool in any given situation and people always look to keep in touch with me because in our interaction, I have connected with and impacted them somehow. And that's a great feeling because most likely, they have impacted me as well and would love to continue the interaction later.

It sounds ridiculous and might come off as over-confident, but that is essentially what networking, meeting people, and potentially meeting the love of your life is all about. If you’re not living your life trying to impact as many people as possible – and allowing people to impact your life – then what are you really doing?

So, I am a pick up artist and I am ready to change your life. The question is:

Are you ready?

Were You A Part of History Yesterday?

Yesterday was a big deal for me. Not only was it my first time voting, on my ballot, I had the option to choose an African-American to lead this great country. It occurred to me that we, as Black people have progressed so much! I mean, it was only a half-century ago when we couldn't even vote! And now, one of us has been elected President of the United States of America!

Well anyway, I took the opportunity to do my first video blog on this special day and I hope you enjoy.

What a day in history!

The Pick Up Artist Episode 4: Review

So after almost getting the shaft at the conclusion of Episode 3, Rian stays in and Karl gets the boot. Probably the better choice but it seems like Mystery’s decisions are pretty random. I don’t see who is going to become a pickup artist after this. I mean there will be one because it’s a TV show and they have to choose one but still. No one has proven to even be worthy of the title.

So this week is all about understand their sexual prowess (if any). Mystery asks a few guys about their sexual history. Looks like there hasn’t been much going on in these guys’ sex lives. That sucks a lot. There is no feeling like having a sexual interaction with a woman. Even if it is just a kiss, it can be the most wonderful thing in the world. I really can’t wait for these guys to get to that point. I’m just worried about how long it’ll take them.

Mystery introduces the group to a sexologist. She looks OK but I am a fan of Mystery bringing in these various women into the mix. I just expect the quality of women to increase as the show goes on. The sexologist’s goal is to teach these guys how to be a better lover.

I’ll just briefly comment that the mannequin idea was creepy, awkward and unnecessary. That’s all I’ll say.

She shows them some erogenous zones on a woman’s body – of course with a little female-on-female teasing action. Let’s see if I can remember the ones that she talked about:

1. Earlobe
2. Nape of the neck
3. Breasts
4. Navel
5. Hips
6. Back of knees

Another good one I like is the inside of the elbow. It’s just WAY too sensitive there.

The reward challenge was for them to practice hitting those erogenous zones with a live woman – the sexologist. They would be in a dark room with her for 90 seconds. She wouldn’t know who is who and so she has to choose the winner based on feel alone. The reward: an earpiece with a direct line to Mystery during that night’s field test, which usually guarantees a win.

Everyone was pretty bad in the end. Simeon was a creeper again, slobbering all over the poor woman. He even goes in there with his shirt off. Crazy stuff! Brian pretty much mauls her but that’s expected when the only experience is grabbing a fat person’s boob and running away. The winner ended up being Matt. The sexologist said that Matt seemed focused on her and was enjoying himself, which in turn made her enjoy herself.

Guys, remember that statement. Whenever it comes to sexual interactions, if you focus on her and just enjoy the moment, everyone will be happy. Trust me.

After that joke of a challenge, they get into the theme for today: Kino Escalation and the Kiss Close

When it comes to escalating to potentially a kiss, it’s a gradual thing. She needs to get used to you touching her. Maybe walking arm-in-arm is a great way to start. Then, maybe you’ll want to hug her or push her and tap her on her shoulder. Then eventually, the idea of you two kissing doesn’t seem so ridiculous. It’s all a gradual thing. One thing that I didn’t hear from Mystery or the other wings say that I actually think is important is that whenever approaching a set, it’s best to start kino right away. From the outset, even when you’re using your opener, place your hand on their shoulder or the small of their back. If not done creepily, you’ll be well on your way. If done creepily, you will be blown out – practice makes perfect!

Along with kino, there are compliance tests where you pretty much test how interested she is in you. Based on these tests, you should calibrate to her response and proceed accordingly. These tests are just simple tests to see if she’s is giving you indications of interest (IOIs), such as keeping any part of her body touching you, wanting to get to know you more, being playful/flirty with you, etc. I knew right away that these guys were going to have trouble. They’ve all been struggling creating attraction all season.

Oh, what are these compliance tests? Some examples:

1. Wanting to play a game
2. Making her do a spin for you.
3. Having her buy you a drink.
4. Letting you palm-read her.
5. Getting a hug.
6. And there’s more…

As usual, a separate post will be made on the interactions. I will say that the quality of the women that they are choosing now is getting better and the interactions have a little more substance for me to write about, so it will be fun talking about this stuff!

Rian ended up winning the field test. It wasn’t impressive at all. No one kiss closed and some of the guys couldn’t even number close. It was pretty pathetic. Matt, with Mystery in his ear, couldn’t do anything. I was just shocked at how slowly they are progressing. At least Rian put himself out there and kissed the woman, which I thought was a big step for him. No breakdown for him…yet.

This elimination ceremony presented the medallion, the Kauno (or Kenaz), which symbolizes enlightenment. Check this page out to learn about the Kauno.

Rian didn’t get to choose wingmen and it’s better that way. Mystery needs to start axing people right away. There needs to be some significant improvement or I will think of this entire season as a bust.

So who got eliminated? Not Greg. Todd. But I feel like Mystery just eliminated him randomly. You can see the look on Mystery’s face that he saw some potential in him and just let him go. But I also honestly think Todd might be gay and just doesn’t know it yet. In every interaction with a woman, he just doesn’t seem like he gets it. He has a great smile but something about him is just telling me that he is gay. Oh well. I’m sure we’ll find out sometime down the road.

Stay tuned for my analysis on some of the approaches when I get home and watch the DVR again. Man, I love that thing!

Learn the 10-10-10 Principle

Hope everyone had a great Halloween weekend! I had a big surprise sprung before me when one of my good college buddies was in town from New York. I haven’t seen this guy in almost 3 years and it was great to see him!

My buddy, his girlfriend, his twin brother, his fiancee, his younger brother and I hung out all weekend and on Saturday night I got to see his parents again, which was awesome. His mom is such a cool person and this article is actually dedicated to her because she taught me something that I plan to use in my life from this point forward and I want to share this with you as well as I know you, too, will benefit from it!

It’s called the 10-10-10 Principle.

With every decision that you make in your life, you have to think about how you would like it to affect you in the future. How is your decision going to affect you in the next 10 minutes? How will it affect you in 10 months? 10 years?

You make the decision and if you think that down the road it is going to affect you for the better, you go with it and commit to it.

If you have an amazing interaction with someone and you realize that there may be some things that might hold you back from getting closer to her, you ask yourself, “How badly do I want this in my life?” Is it going to be worth sending her that extra text 10 minutes down the road? 10 months down the road, could she be a significant person in your life? 10 years down the road, could she be the happiest she’s ever been in her life – married to you?

Life is so short, guys. Bring closure to every question that may come up to your head and go to no end to figure it out. We don’t get “lucky” by sitting around and waiting for something to happen. Those who get “lucky” go out and find their luck and don’t stop until they do. Persistence is key and that key could open something that could change your life.

These are the kinds of interactions that serve as points of inflection in your life. For that, I am thankful to know my buddy - and his parents, who have been married for nearly 30 years and still very happy. You think that’s rare? My parents celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary a week ago.

Anything is possible. It’s up to no one but you to make it happen.

So, when you make your decision, think about how it’s going to affect you in the 10s of your future. It could be the difference in changing your life.

Breaking Through the Masks

With Halloween now behind us, it was interesting to reflect on the kinds of people I saw, how the interactions were and what all this means for you, which is obviously why I do this.

I will say that when I went out last night, there were some very creative and interesting costumes. I mean I was really impressed with what I saw. I saw 4 guys dressed up as the crew from Entourage, a few Marilyn Monroes, a firefighter, Robin Hood, security guards, Jesus, cats, a keg, Tom Brady (on crutches), Tony Montana, Power Rangers (yeah, they’re still around), Amy Winehouse and a bunch more. It was fun.

Standing in line, waiting to go inside of a bar, I noticed that everyone was approaching each other asking what their costumes were. Everyone was out to have a good time and meet people. It was so cool to see and be a part of. And it sounds crazy because you would think that people go out to have fun and meet people all the time. But this was much different.

I realized a few interesting things. Halloween is one of the holidays where people are most likely to hook up. Makes sense, really. Besides the alcohol-induced entertainment going around all over the city there is something else that is going on here.

When we wear costumes, we are literally putting on a mask and assuming that identity. Which means we can act however and say whatever we want and it’s justifiable because we are in costume – it’s not who we really are. When in this costume for this one night, we feel like there’s nothing to lose because we’re not hurting our own identity – it’s just a costume. And why does it matter anyway? It only happens once a year. As a result, there is a huge increase in people projecting confidence and people are much more open to conversation because not only do they want to be approached, they want people to talk about their costume and say how cool it is.

Think of the costume itself as a great icebreaker that will work every time.

The easiest opener last night was, “who are you supposed to be?” Just like that – instant conversation. What was cool was paying attention to where the conversation led. If someone was just interested in the costume, they would keep asking questions about the costume like, “how did you come up with that?” or, “where did you get all the gear?” If someone was actually interested in the person behind the costume, they would stop talking about the costume and asking questions about the person.

“So who are you here with?”

“What brings you here?”

“Have you been to this place before?”

It’s just a shame that it has to take a holiday for people to make an excuse to hide behind a false identity and be more social. If we could work on it everyday, who knows what could happen. Fortunately, with Halloween being on a Friday, this celebration will continue throughout the weekend. So if you’re going out, if you see someone dressed up in something cool, all you have to do is ask, “Who are you?”

But let this also be a lesson that it’s so easy to approach people and start conversation. Remember the whole thing about stating the obvious? Well a costume couldn’t be a more obvious thing to talk about. But when this holiday is over and people start wearing normal clothes again, the same rule applies. Notice something about them or the environment around them and make a comment on it. The kind of comment where you know the both of you are thinking the same thing except you have the guts to actually say it. Get it?

So who are (were) you for Halloween?

Wow, I Can't Believe I Did This

Fresh from doing my first Podcast yesterday and having the chance to reflect on it while at work today, it made me think of one thing. Man, did I just put myself out there – and it was great.

It’s hard to believe but when things like that go down, I get pretty nervous. The same really goes for when I approach a really attractive woman. I remember right before the Podcast, I was sweating and breathing rather quickly – yeah, I know, it sounds silly but well go through this. Then it just hit me. “Thomas, do you realize what you are doing? How many people would be able to do what you are doing? And besides, not only are you helping others out face their fears and improve themselves, but your mere presence alone will be the example of how to defeat your demons.”

After that pep talk, I was good to go, and the Podcast went really well for the first episode, despite the moments of blurriness. Once I edit it, it’ll be up for all to see!

But for me to take that risk was huge for me. It’s not like I am camera-shy – I’ve been on TV a few times and love to be in photos. There was just something in me that made me nervous. And in times like that, when I don’t understand why I’m nervous, I just automatically assume that I just need to ignore it and take the risk. Now, I’m excited to be on camera. And I do this with anything. It just doesn’t matter to me anymore. There is nothing really terrible that can come from taking a risk. You can only learn from it and learning to improve yourself is never a bad thing.

Be prepared to start seeing some video posts in the future.

But when you feel like the pressure is getting to you, make the decision to take the risk. If you let the pressure win, chances are it’s going to be even harder to beat it when you face the adversity again. That made sense, right? Don’t let the pressure of doing something you really want to do take over your life. You make the take-over and battle your demons.

Make the move and go for it! Life is all about learning and as far as I’m concerned, you are always in position to better yourself. I’m lying here in bed and as I’m writing this, I am learning so much more about the kind of person I am becoming and it amazes me. You need to do that too – well you’ll probably learn more out of bed but you get my point.

A really good person, Chris Brogan, who I consider a friend, said this only an hour ago,

“If you're not failing at something, you're not living a full enough life. Respect relationships but break the he'll out of everything else. And if you break relationships, say sorry, try your best, and love your own way.”

I don’t think I need to explain this.

If there is a time when you start feeling nervous, acknowledge it and then whatever it is you’re nervous about – do it anyway. Afraid to eat that last piece of blueberry pie? Don't know why you would but eat it. See that hot woman over there sitting down with her coffee, reading a book? Go ask her what she’s reading. Want to wear that flashy vest out but don’t think it’s like what you normally wear? Wear it tonight! Do what you like!

Promise me that you’ll go out and do something that you’ve always been nervous about. I’m telling you that you are guaranteed to learn something from the experience, whether you succeed or fail. You are also going to feel less pressure – you might actually want to do it again. Imagine that. And all it takes is practice.

Like I always say: it’s not going to be an overnight transformation. This will take time. But be persistent, work hard and you’ll get better at anything you put your mind to.

If you want to talk to me more about this, email me at infinity@recklessstudio.com.

The Pick Up Artist Episode 3: Review

 

So now that Kevin is gone, who’s going to be my favorite? Well, I know as soon as I mention his name, he’ll be eliminated within a couple of weeks. So I’m going to say his name anyway. Brian.

Yes, the other Asian has become my favorite. I knew he would do well but what I failed to acknowledge is the fun factor out of all of this. Yes, when you are learning something that will change your life, it should be taken seriously. But in the process of knowing that your life will forever change, wouldn’t it be nice to have fun? And out of the entire group, Brian is the only one that truly enjoys this journey and has fun with it.

But, let’s get into this week’s show.

So Mystery takes the remaining contestants to a medial facility and talks to them about the science of attraction, which I thought was pretty interesting. We all have gone through this many times in our lives and I’ll admit that I still go through this on occasion. When you see that absolutely gorgeous woman and you want to talk to her, your hands get all sweaty, you start breathing heavily and just get generally nervous. Well one of the things that I like to preach is just to be laid back about the moment and enjoy yourself. Mystery says the same thing, pretty much – to regulate your breathing and maintain warm hands.

That being said, Mystery decides to test them to see who has the most control under a stressful situation. The winner’s reward would be the ability to hang out in the truck and watch the other players in the night’s field challenge before he has to go out there himself. That is a huge advantage and it almost guarantees being safe from elimination if done properly.

Well the way this challenge was set up was that they would be hooked up to this machine that would monitor heartbeat and other vitals. As the doctor is hooking these guys up, the stimulus shows up in the form of Samantha, who is dressed up as a hot nurse. Considering it’s almost Halloween, I am pretty excited to see some hot nurses out there this weekend. She had a smoking body and I certainly would not complain if she fell in my lap but for some reason, I feel like she wouldn’t be my type. Interesting. I might have to look into that a little more.

So everyone pretty much failed at keeping his cool. Karl did a decent job and Simeon was really weird because he tried to take the whole thing too seriously…and still failed. But the winner the Greg and it wasn’t even close. Like I said, if you’re having fun, you tend to do better in anything you interact with in life. Hot women included.

Mystery then gets into the topic of the day: Body Language

With this topic, Mystery also decides to bring back the winner of season 1, Kosmo. Here, Kosmo talks about how it is important for the guys to realize that this is about building a life. And he’s right, it is about building a life. It’s not about just picking up women. It’s about having the confidence, the will and the motivation to go out there and accomplish any goal you set forth.

But really quickly, there are a few things to point out about body language and interacting with the opposite sex. Your body language is going to say more than anything you could possibly say with your mouth. Girls have this unbelievable ability of reading body language. If your body language is not congruent with what you are saying or who you are projecting to be, they will pick up on it and maybe call you out on it. Either way, you lose your chance with her. There are the common telltale signs of nervousness and “lower value.” Things like gesturing wildly, playing with the straw in your drink, keeping your drink at your chest, leaning in and other things are basic examples of things that guys do, don’t notice and are habitual.

Mystery’s approach with body language is something I would pay attention to because it’s very non-threatening and it conveys the highest value. Like I said, being laid back and enjoying the experience is what you should convey at all times. Examples of that would be to shift your weight to one side when standing, keeping your hands out of your pockets, keeping your drink by your side and leaning back often. Even when approaching a group, sometimes it’s good to talk over your shoulder, just to show that you’re just creating conversation and having fun. With the combination of that and using false time constraints (FTC), people will want you to join in on conversations, no matter what the subject is.

Simeon has a sit-down with Kosmo and talks about his struggles. Simeon has really good potential. He just needs to regulate his energy a little bit more and he should be fine. He may have some little issues here and there but they can be corrected rather quickly. Basically, Kosmo says, “You gotta defeat your demons.”
Couldn’t say it any better. If you are having issues in life and want to better yourself, you have to face those issues head-on and beat them.

All the guys have a motivational session before going out. Their challenge for the night is to use proper body language to attract and isolate a woman or a group of women.

I’ll have my complete analysis in my next post.

Greg, with the advantage wins the challenge, although I thought it was pretty close this time.

Rian has a breakdown, which brings his Breakdown Count up to 4.

Elimination ceremony and the medallion that is presented to the winners is the Laguz, which is the rune of cleansing. You can learn all about it here. It’s pretty cool.

Karl ends up getting eliminated. Once again, another guy I thought had serious potential gets the door. He was slow in improvement so I can understand why. I just wonder which pick up artist is going to want to help him finish his transformation.

Stay tuned for my complete analysis of each interaction these guys go through. There weren’t really many so this should be pretty simple. And because there were a few isolations, it’ll be fun to talk about how and why these things happened.

As always, comments are always appreciated.

There Are Other Ways To Tie A Tie - You Know What I'm Talking About

We all remember when we first learned how to tie a tie. Most guys would say that their father taught them. To be honest, my dad never taught me. I mean, my dad rarely wears a tie and I love him for that. He was all about the collarless button-downs. I actually learned how to tie a tie from a friend of mine. But unless we were fortunate enough to have a father that knew more than one way to tie a tie, we were destined to tie it the same way, which after a while can get pretty lame.

I decided that I wanted to at least know a different way to tie a tie.

Well, after some looking around, I came across an article from AskMen.com, by Brandon Dyce about the different ways to tie a tie - there are 4! I would personally check this out and practice this in the mirror. For some reason, I think it would be a cool thing to know.

When it comes to tie-tying, most of us are one-dimensional at best. Some guys mastered the art of a single knot a long time ago, and then left well enough alone; those of us who seldom wear ties either leave the thing tied or rely on a clip. And not that any of this is right or wrong, but as men, especially well-dressed men, we should possess the practical skills of learning how to tie a tie and creating various tie knots. It’s not a “one-knot-fits-all” world we live in. So, in an attempt to increase your tie-tying acumen, here is a quick look at how to tie a tie and achieve four of the most popular knots.

Windsor

The granddaddy of them all, the Windsor is the most traditional knot and it the first one to master when you learn how to tie a tie; it creates a hefty, professional-looking knot, meaning that it works best for any occasion when you want to look completely respectable.

1. Place the tie around your shoulders, top-side up, with the fat end hanging roughly a foot lower than the skinny end.


2. Cross the fat portion over the skinny end to make an X fairly close to your neck (around the second shirt button).


3. Loop the fat end underneath the thin end and up through the neck loop. Drop it down so that it overlaps the thin end again.


4. Pull the fat end behind the bundle of cloth you've created (your first step toward the final knot) to the left. Pull it up and drop it down through the neck loop again, then pull it to the left again.


5. Pull the fat end over from left to right, overlapping your evolving knot.


6. Pull the fat end up through the loop again, behind what now looks like a nearly complete knot.


7. Bring the fat end back down and insert it through the knot.


8. Finish your knot by tightening it. In doing so, you will see the beginnings of a natural dimple form. Manipulate it manually to make this dimple as distinct as possible. Its purpose is to add depth to an otherwise flat, bland-surfaced tie, and concurrently to mark you as a man of style. You will never leave the house without a dimple in your tie again.

Half-Windsor

In the same vein as the Windsor, the Half-Windsor enjoys a professional prestige and polished reputation; however, it’s not quite as bulky, which makes it a better option for narrower collars and softer shirts.

1. Place the tie around your shoulders, top-side up, with the fat end hanging roughly a foot lower than the skinny end.


2. Cross the fat portion over the skinny end to make an X fairly close to your neck (around the second shirt button).


3. Pull the fat end behind the thin end to the right, then up in front of it and down through the neck loop.


4. Pull the fat end over from right to left, overlapping your evolving knot.


5. Pull the fat end up through the loop again, behind what now looks like a nearly complete knot.


6. Bring the fat end back down and insert it through the knot.


7. Finish your knot by tightening it; again, accentuate that dimple.

Four-in-Hand

Looking for a knot with little time-investment and less pretension? The Four-in-Hand is all yours. It’s an on-the-go knot that works with both casual looks and narrow collars.

1. Place the tie around your shoulders, top-side up, with the fat end hanging roughly a foot lower than the skinny end.


2. Cross the fat portion over the skinny end to make an X fairly close to your neck (around the second shirt button).


3. Wrap the fat end around the thin end, then up through the neck loop. Drop the fat end back down and through the knot.


4. Finish your knot by tightening it. Note that the dimple is much harder to produce on this kind of knot and may prove entirely elusive.

Pratt

The Pratt is that well-rounded knot most guys will depend on religiously; its symmetrical look and less complicated construction deem the Pratt the most universal knot that goes with any dress shirt.

1. Place the tie around your neck upside down (with the seams facing outward). Note that the fat end should be hanging lower than the thin end.


2. Cross the two ends over to form an X and flip the fat end up and through the loop to form a knot around the smaller end.


3. Pull both ends apart quite tightly to ensure your knot is snug, then bring the fat end of the tie over the thin end to cover your first knot.


4. Pull the fat end up and through the loop, then drop it down through the knot.

5. Tighten and dimple up.

So practice, learn what you can, and tie it all together. It's a subtle change to your wardrobe that people DO notice.

The Countdown to Podcast Infinity Continues!

As the countdown to Podcast Infinity continues, I just wanted to talk about a few things really quickly.

I am so pumped for this! I don’t know what about it has me excited but it just does. Maybe I have the opportunity to help tons more people out there. Maybe I can provide a weekly segment of entertainment for some. I have no idea what to expect and that alone keeps me excited!

The second thing is that you are all more than welcome to come by the Draft and hang out. I mean, don’t come just for me – although, that would be nice. There are always cool things going on at the Draft.

Tonight, there is karaoke going on starting…actually right now! They are also serving 25-cent wings, which for me is worth the trip. I might actually go down there – since I am hungry and all.

Wednesday night, after Podcast Infinity, the Draft will hold their weekly trivia contest. Being a huge trivia guy, I would love to assemble a team and try to take out the competition.

There are always things going on at the Draft so I hope to see you there sometime. And did I mention that they have over 17 different drafts, flat screens and the occasional live music? It’s just a good place to go to and the people who work there are cool. Be sure to say hi to my boys Derek, Jesse and Tim for me! I’d give love to the bartenders but I only know Jen. She’s cool – I guess.

So enjoy the countdown and I hope to inspire, motivate and entertain you while we all strive to achieve the success we deserve!