Honey and Lance's Virgin Roundup

Over the course of a couple of weeks, a large group of bloggers have posted articles about virginity. This has sparked some talk recently over hearing news about women selling their virginity and other discussions about how the "virgin" is lost and virginity is not only rare but no longer "a big deal." These are some great articles - so much so that I am re-posting Lance's post, giving links to all of the articles. I hope you can check it out and post your comments.

There will be more roundtables to come so stay tuned!

That’s right, our virgin roundtable kicked friggin’ ass. Big props to all the bloggers who participated, you people rock. For this edition of The Weekly I’ll list all of the posts that were submitted for the roundtable and also give a brief summary. We’ve got an awesome range of perspectives, from single mothers to pickup artists to peeps who just recently lost their vcards. Link love and pagerank to all.

Hammer - Blogger Roundtable: Virginity - Hammer is a 22-year-old social artist living and working in New York City. He’s sharp as a tack, specializes in online game, and writes good stuff. Since we attended the TSBMag Mansformation Retreat, he’s my new homeboy.

Matt Savage - The Dilemmas Of Male Virgins - Matt Savage pens The Modern Savage blog. He’s a seduction artist and lost his virginity at age 27, so his perspective is perfect for this topic. In this post he talks about the conundrums of being a male virgin.

Beauty of the Year - Virgin Vendetta - “Lisa” write this blog about family, sex, friends, happiness, and rage. She lost her virginity at age 17, she’s glad she did, and thinks everyone should ditch their vcards in their teenage years. She also has sex with married men and waxs poetic about the simplicity of these relationships. Obviously, you’ll want to stop by this one!

Effy - Why Wait? An argument against saving yourself - Effy is a 27-year-old social artist who also happens to be a South Carolina Gamecocks fan. You poor bastard. Seriously, I follow ‘Cocks football because you have my old football coach, Steve Spurrier. They always find a way to fuck up big games. Go SEC, though! Effy gives a compelling argument against saving the vcard for marriage. His perspective comes from someone who lives in the Bible Belt and he sees a lot of couples getting married way too young.

Hot Alpha Female - Let’s Talk About Sex…Baby - From one of my fav Aussie Bloggers, sex kitten attraction specialist HAF has one word for all virgin bashers: RESPECT. Also, her post has a picture of me as a kid…where did you find that??

Evil Woobie - Why is Virginity a Big Deal Among Filippinos? - Evil Woobie is a terrific blogger in the Philippines who writes about sex, dating, and astrology. Check out her post where she ponders why (or why not) Filippino men value virgins.

Project Infinity - The More “Touchy” Part of Dating: Sex & Virgins - Infinity is 23-year-old pickup artist who also blogs about fashion, lifestyle, and dating. In this post, he talks about the special connection you make with your partner after the first time and how sex gives you confidence. He also ponders the notion if a GUY could sell his virginity, a la Natalie Dylan.

The Quest for T - Virginity: A Girl and a Mom’s perspective - T is a single mother who offers her perspective on losing her own virginity and how she would handle the issue when talking with her two young daughters. She’s also big into masturbating, so I give her props for that!

Lisaq - The Value of Virginity - Lisaq gives a very honest perspective on losing one’s virginity at age 15 in 1977, and she argues for holding onto virginity until the right person and the right circumstances come along. Lisaq is one of the co-authors of the 20-forty.com.

Kira - Losing Your V-Card: Big Deal or Big Whoop? - Kira offers her losing-virginity story, which by her own admissions was a disaster. Check it out and also read about her views on when is the right time to do it.

Bobby Rio - Virgins For Sale - One of my homeboys at tsbmag.com writes about how taking a girl’s vcard gets you admission past the guarded gates…for life!

Holly Hoffman - How my mom helped me lose my v-card - Holly talks about her how sex affected her relationship with her big sister and her mom, and also how she deflowered her FIRST THREE BOYFRIENDS. Obviously, you’ll want to read this one.

Single Mom Seeking - Why I’m aspiring to be a virgin again - Rachel Sarah is a 36-year-old single mom who offers the single mom’s perspective on sex and vcards. She wants to be a virgin again! Seriously, she writes a good post, so stop by.

I Date White - The Brotha Virgin - Eathan from idatewhite.com gives his own hilarious twist on the topic of virginity, here he talks about how white women are “brotha virgins,” that is, they’ve never been with a black man. You know what they say, once you go black, you can’t go back.

Dad’s House - Virginity? It’s So Overrated - David Mott is a single dad and he says that virginity is majorly overrated, and he tells you what great sex is.

My Secret Hobby - Virginity, what’s the deal? - One of my favorite new bloggers, Kiera is a self-proclaimed “cockwhore” and her blog tagline is “The Pursuit Of Cock.” Shit, what’s not to like, eh? She’s been an un-virgin for less than a year, so her perspective is pretty cool. Since The Dateable Dork (can we still have sex??) exploded her blog, Kiera might be the next hottie-sex blogger around these parts.

The American Virgin - Let’s Talk Virgins - This whole site is about virgins, and in fact, they’re making a documentary about it! Stop on by.

New World Yankee - You Dragged A Rampaging Virgin Out Of Me! - Yankee is an female medical student studying in Hungary. Here, she gets her rant on about all things virgin.

The Virgin - Roundtable: Virginity - And of course we couldn’t hold a roundtable on this topic without getting The Virgin to participate, despite the fact that he just popped his sacred cherry and he’s now on blogging vacay.

Here are the posts from Honey and Lance. Again, thanks to everyone who participated. May your Alexa rank decrease and may you get on the frontpage of Google every time!!

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The Four Pillars of the Male Mind - Part 2

This is the second part of my article, The Four Pillars of the Male Mind. You can see the first part here. As you know, the first two pillars were the Asshole and the Artist. If you can connect or pinpoint some of the characteristics that make them attractive then you are well on your way.

Let’s get right into it. Here are the last two pillars of the male mind.

Pillar Three – the Shy Goofball


We are all goofballs at heart. Sometimes, we can be the most awkward person ever. And I mean, stick us in a situation we’ve never been in before, and we will just burn in a blaze of glory. These guys are awesome because out of all the pillars, this one is the most genuine. You can’t fake shyness and being awkward. Maybe you can fake shyness, but you can’t fake awkwardness. You could create awkward situations but this is different. I am talking as typical as being that kid in high school, carrying a girl’s books down the hall and tripping over yourself, books flying everywhere and you blush as you look up at her from the ground. Yeah, that kind of goofy and awkward.

You want to know why women love that kind of guy? It’s pretty simple. Because they are REAL. There is a sense of vulnerability that the awkward goof has that women do find attractive. The perfect example: Steve Urkel. He was the definition of the shy goof.

If you’re this person at heart, it’s cool, man. We get so caught up in this world where we think we need to be a certain person that’s cool and smooth. And although this article may seem like it’s not helping, what I want you to do is keep your natural attributes (where you are great), while adding some things to help your speech, body language and appearance. You’re as real as it gets, so you’re pretty much set, which is awesome. All you got to do is get yourself more out there, which is where the shy part comes in and stops you. We will work on that, I promise.

When I was in high school, I was a total goof. I wasn’t the popular one, but I was ok with that. Eventually, I realized that there is someone out there that will love me, just like how I am (not that I was confident enough to go out and find her). And then, I found the most amazing person in high school and we dated for a very long time and to this day, we are great friends.

So, if your sticking point is the fact that you don’t think you’ll be liked, work on getting that out of your head. I’m sure there is a dating site out there that is dedicated to finding shy and awkward people. If you find it, look and see how many people are there available for you. Chances are it won’t be in the single digits so you must know that there are tons out there, waiting for you to fall in front of them (often, literally).

Pillar Four – the Hopeless Romantic


Everyone sees this person as the “nice guy.” He’s that guy that we all claim to be and complain that we can’t get the girl. Or if we can get the girl, we complain that we can’t keep the girl because, “we’re too nice.” Or we’ll get the “it’s not you, it’s me.” This guy is so sweet, sensitive and caring, who would pass up on him? Seems like everyone. He’s a pretty good-looking guy that takes care of himself and is a man of integrity. He is so nice to women that it alone can sweep them off of their feet (initially). Unfortunately, this is the same kind of guy that claims to get screwed over the most.

Sometimes, we can’t help it. You like someone enough you want to show that you are the sweetest, most romantic person ever. You want to do everything for her and accommodate her every wish. You’ll even make sacrifices for her. Whatever happens in your life doesn’t matter. It’s all about her. You'll do whatever it takes to make her happy - even if it means making yourself miserable. See where I’m going with this? Are you starting to feel uncomfortable as you read this? You’re supposed to. It’s not natural. We’re not really supposed to be doing those last few things (maybe if you’re in a committed relationship, such as marriage). But we do them anyway. We can’t help it. We love the girl too damn much. But, in essence it’s overwhelming and I personally can’t blame any woman for running away from it.

You know the great thing about being nice is, though? We can all still be the nice guys. But let her see all of those great attributes in little tidbits. She’s had access to about 1000 times more men than you’ve had access to women. I’m pretty confident that she can figure out who’s a nice guy or not. If she wanted things done for her, she could easily go out and get a wuss. Every guy is going to treat their lady well - they know that. But it's what else you being to the relationship and how you do those nice things that make the difference. By doing this (sparingly), you will realize that she will appreciate you more and be less likely to take you for granted (that usually happens when she can figure out when or if you’re going to do something nice for her). Women reading this might get upset because of what I just said – and that’s fine. They can defend themselves in the comments. But understand this. If women already know what they’re going to get (aka, see you as predictable), they will be bored (with the relationship – not you) very quickly – unless they are looking for marriage. So, make it interesting and do things so that your relationship always has that hint of unpredictability.

In the end, it’s important to know that if one of these pillars doesn’t dominate your personality, that doesn’t mean that you need to change your life to tailor to a particular pillar (unless you want to). But know that you possess these attributes and they’re somewhere in that head of yours, dying to come out. You just need to look at the attributes each pillar has and find a way to integrate it into your own special DNA. It’s who you are that’s important…it really is – don’t forget it. But in order to get the chance to get women to know you, you have to display these initial attractive qualities that I think every male possesses. Just a matter of finding them and bringing them out. Good luck, guys.

As always, if you have any questions or comments, post them here or email me.

Great News and Fun Times Ahead!

So now that I am fully recovered from my accident, I am ready to go forward and start having fun with this site.

There will be new additions to the site and they will be awesome! They will be geared to educate you in specific aspects of lifestyle and confidence - specifically with talking to women. I, fortunately will have help with these sections so it should be a good time. I can't wait to help you guys get better in these aspects of your life. I'm really excited! Look out for these great additions over the course of the weekend.

If you have any comments or would like to contribute to the site, send all inquiries to infinity@recklessstudio.com

Oh, also in other news...I am going to be in a promotional video! Details AND the video coming as soon as it can be legally released!!!

The Four Pillars of the Male Mind - Part 1

I have been watching a show that was on TV (but I never heard of it) and watched its entire series (2 Seasons) on YouTube. The show’s called Keys to the VIP: The Professional League for Players. The show’s premise is pretty simple.

Stick two guys in a bar with hidden cameras and they have to accomplish certain “goals” based on three different challenges. For example, one challenge is called Speed Dial. In this challenge, each guy has to try to get a woman’s number within a minute. After 3 challenges, the winner gets a night of bottle service at a nightclub in the city (haven’t figured out what city, yet). How are the winners determined?

Four guys review the challenges and provide color commentary and analysis of each player’s performance. These four guys are supposed to represent the corners of the male psyche. I prefer not to call it corners because there is a sense of restriction there and I don’t think these four “corners” represent the average male. But I do agree that we all possess these qualities in some way.

Here I am going to divide this into two articles so that you can get a good grasp on each one and not overwhelm yourself with information. Maybe, you can figure out which pillar dominates your mind the most.

So without further ado, here are the first two (2) of four (4) pillars of the male mind.

Pillar One – The Asshole.

That is what everyone would generally describe this person. He is a douchebag and doesn’t care about anyone else but himself. He’ll say whatever, whenever, without any kind of filter or remorse. He has a distinct sense of humor some people can’t take. If he offends anyone, he’ll shrug it off and assume you know he’s kidding. We all know this but it can go a little deeper than that.

He would be considered a results-oriented kind of guy. He doesn’t care how the results are shown but anything less is unacceptable. He’s a decision-maker and doesn’t care if people follow. But people usually do end up following – and he knows that. That usually makes anything he does pretty deliberate. It's important to keep that in mind. He’s somewhat cold – almost cerebral. His level of shame is pretty low, but he’s does have a high level of respect for himself. It’s very rare to seem him fazed by a situation only because of his deliberate actions.

This is usually whom most guys hate because he’s the asshole that gets all the girls and yet, he acts like a total douche. What you need to realize is what’s going on around him is really what matters here.

The next time you go out, look for that guy and notice his persona. Does he seem to care? How laid-back does he look? How is he interacting with women? How is he touching them? How loud is he being right now? What is he wearing? What about him stands out?

All of these questions are important to discover what about him makes him so attractive to women. Yeah, he looks like an ass. But let me be specific on one thing. WOMEN DO NOT LIKE ASSHOLES. They clearly don’t want someone to be rude to them. If they do, chances are they may have some deeper issues. But what assholes are that you need to be is FUN, RELAXED and CAREFREE. Be a fun time – even if it is for that moment. If you can get women to enjoy your company and others see it, you just became attractive.

Attraction is exponential.

Pillar Two – the Artist

Notice those guys? Usually they have some type of artistic talent. Maybe they’re a painter or sculptor. Maybe they’re a music DJ. Architect? Web designer? Magician? Animator? A poet? Writer? Illusionist? Anything really that involves creativity is attractive. It makes him unique because not many people are able to do it and he somehow has been able to become a success from it. These guys can range from being the quiet, secret type, to the loud, social type. It depends on the profession. If he’s a DJ, a magician or anything that involves his face being in the public, he’s going to be that sociable person. I mean, it’s a part of his job. Other professions that are more “behind-the-scenes” tend to breed quieter people – but just quieter in voice. If he is creative, he will always have something to say. He provides that “outside-the-box” point of view that not many people will think about, but appreciate. He’s a natural risk taker because there is a certain risk when involved with creativity. He knows people may not agree with him, and that’s ok – he’s used to that and isn’t bothered.

With these guys, they can pretty much be pointed out by their style, what they say and how they’re saying it. There’s a certain seduction advantage these guys have just because they’re creative. I know, it may not make sense, but if you want to show a little seductive side, you should think creatively. Sounds ridiculous? Not good enough? Try this.

Slow your words down and make every word just as significant as the last. Everything you say should seem like it’s important. Help others find different perspectives to something (if they’re open to it). Artists work hard but they are very patient with what they have to do because they want it to be perfect and convey the right message. You do the same. The artist is a more difficult pillar to understand simply because, you have to have some type of creative element to your personal DNA (as in, you do one of those jobs I mentioned above). But the one thing that’s common with all artists is that they’re message is always expressed clearly.

In the next article, we will discuss the last two pillars and then figure out how you can maximize the strengths of each pillar regardless of what kind of person you are.

Stay tuned!

An Important Message

So if you have noticed, there have been only a couple new articles in the past few days. I apologize for the recent lack of articles. It has been a crazy few weeks, as I have been getting more exposure and opening myself up to new ideas and events for Project Infinity . Plus, as I am in the process of getting a promotion at my other job, my days have been long and my nights have been even longer. But this all a good thing, but I couldn’t do it without support and interest from everyone. For that, I thank you all . It means a lot and it gives me the energy to keep going.

 

Then, there was a point of inflection that happened to me.

 

This morning, as I was going to work, I was involved in a car accident. It was at that moment that, I realized that my time here on this planet would be shorter than I want it to be. Fortunately, after going to hospital, I was told I don’t have any serious injuries. I have the next two days off from work and as I lay here in bed resting with my laptop all I could think about is how much I want to continue to help people with bettering their lives and make as much of an impact in this world as possible. I plan on getting most of my rest tonight and then tomorrow, the fun begins.

 

That being said, I have a few announcements.

 

I am looking for people interested in writing posts in the following categories:

 

Fashion (for men)

 

Dating (guest posts would be awesome)

 

I am not particularly looking for writing experience. I am looking for passion. If you really have a passion for these kinds of things and think you could contribute something special, then e-mail me and let’s work something out.

 

I am also going to open up another section that I believe is important to men, but that announcement will be made later in the week.

 

I also am accepting feedback on content and overall look of the site as well. I want to make your experience here as awesome as possible.

 

Feel free to click the What’s Up? link to your left or email me directly at infinity@recklessstudio.com

 

Once again, I thank you all and I look forward to giving you my best.

 

The More “Touchy” Part of Dating: Sex & Virgins

For most guys, this is a very important goal when it comes to dating. Some would like to gain a girlfriend – maybe a wife. Others would just like the ability to date many women. Others would like to seduce women into having sex. Whatever your goal is, when it comes down to it, sex is something that is important to any man – getting it ( a lot ) and being good at it.

 

But before we get into all of that good stuff, let’s talk about something we all were at some point in our lives (and still are, for some). Being a virgin .

It seems like it’s very rare to come across a virgin, unless they’re in their very low teens – and even then it might be hard, considering how early kids can get access to sexual activity (online porn, watching TV, magazines, etc.). I personally have a lot of respect for a virgin that is able to not give in to the temptation of sex. It really doesn’t matter where you are, sex is thrown in your face all the time. I mean, I have the TV on and I glanced up and all I saw was a large set of breasts (FYI it was the Discovery Channel). I mean, it was good timing on my part but that just also shows you that you can’t avoid it. So for someone to ignore those things is pretty impressive, regardless of their reason.

 

Now should virginity have monetary value? If you read my posts on Natalie Dylan and Raffaela Fico, you know what I am talking about: Selling your virginity for absurd amounts of money. I guess in a capitalist world, it makes sense, but it’s still considered a form of prostitution (although, legal) since you are selling sex – and no, also being taken out for dinner and a movie doesn’t make it different.

 

So I was thinking about it and had different perspectives. Guys clearly couldn’t do this. Maybe if you were a celebrity, you would have a slight chance. But as a guy, you should know that we don’t get as much access to women as women do to guys so for us to charge for sex would be pretty silly. But recently, I came across something pretty interesting.

 

Now, as far as I know, I have not taken any woman’s virginity. A little disappointing since I really haven’t felt the emotional and sexual bond with a woman after taking her virginity – that, in my opinion, would be pretty special. Of course, when I had my virginity taken I had that emotion (and it was wonderful) but it was one-sided. But, one thing that was pretty intriguing was that for most of the women I have had sexual relationships with; I was able to make them achieve their first real orgasm. I didn’t think this was a big deal until I read somewhere that women rarely achieve an orgasm during intercourse. I found this to be pretty interesting.

 

Not to say that I have the magic touch – but what if I do? What if I have the ability to make a woman experience not just any orgasm, but making her feel something unlike anything else they’re ever experienced – for a long time, every time? Would I have high market value? Could I sell this as a “gift,” just like the “gift” of being a virgin? It is an interesting perspective to think about.

 

But I think in either situation, I think what is important is the experience . Sex is supposed to be fun , sensual and exhilarating . I think if there is one thing that I would tell virgins about having sex for the first time is that they should just live in the moment. Savor every feeling. Take your time. Revel in the fact that this is without a doubt the best feeling you’re having right now and you’re having it for the first time. And then when you’re done, remember that it won’t be the last.

 

For me, having sex for the first time opened me up as an extremely sociable person. There was this new sense of confidence that I never felt before. It was amazing. Nothing could stop me and I was untouchable. I just felt amazing. Plus, that sexual experience was something very special to me. An experience worth remembering for a lifetime.

 

The closest thing I could compare it to would be the feeling you get after a workout at the gym. When you know you had a great workout, you look and feel great. Your confidence peaks and you have this sudden urge to go and be sociable because you feel like you’re looking your best. I feel like sex is like that…but on a stratospheric level.

 

When you think about it, sex can generate a string of emotions that can be rare for some people to experience. That alone gives it significant value, and explains why so many people so after it. That’s why people can sell sex. But monetary value for people who have no sexual experience? We’ll have to see how that plays out.

This post is part of a roundtable series on virginity as started by Honey and Lance. I will be linking to other posts below during the week. Feel free to chime in yourself and leave a comment over at honeyandlance.com.

 

Do or Do Not. There Is No Try.

I came across this quote the other day and it sparked an unknown feeling inside of me. I have never felt this way before. Or maybe I have and did not recognize it until now. Let me explain.

When you have a decision to make and you are unsure of the outcome, when you make up your mind to TRY something, certain emotions run through your body. When you TRY something, your expectations lie on a spectrum, ranging from “not going to work out” to “going to work out.” You go through all these feelings of “what if it does, or doesn’t work.” You think of worst-case and best-case scenarios. Bad scenarios make you feel hesitant and less confident, while good scenarios make you excited, determined and more confident. These feelings are constantly wavering on the spectrum as you approach your decision.

At the point when you actually make your decision to TRY that exact position on that spectrum is the one that you physically portray through your voice, body language and facial expression. If you’re on the lower end of the spectrum, your decision going to show through your body language and chances are, you will get those associated results (worst-case scenarios). However it does happen that you do get positive results despite being on that side of the spectrum. I feel as though that’s where the emotion of surprise comes in. Your body didn’t expect the positive results but they happened anyway.

On the flip side, if you are on the higher end of the spectrum, you will likely get positive results. Notice that when it actually happens, you’re not as surprised about it because you’re body and mind expected the positive outcome. Now if something bad happened, the element of surprise comes in again, but not the good kind, of course.

The reason for this elaborate and wordy explanation is because when you make a decision, you need to eliminate doubt from your mind. You need to be at either extreme end of the spectrum. When it’s time to make a decision, you need to either DO it, or NOT DO it – and stick to it. Any inkling of doubt, and you’re back to wavering on the spectrum.

This not only applies to women, but in life. Anything you approach in life is a DO or DO NOT. Want to learn to play a guitar? DO it. Want to talk to that hot female you’ve been ogling the past couple weeks? DO it. Don’t feel like working a 9-5 job anymore? DO NOT DO it. There is NO element of TRY in life. That word was just created to let people make excuses if things weren’t to go the way they wanted. You decide that you’re going to do something and you DO it! Doesn’t matter how long it takes. If you REALLY want to achieve that goal, you are going to do it. There’s nothing else to it.

In that extreme spectrum of thought, there is no doubt. You ONLY see best-case scenarios. When you get the results, you’re not surprised because you EXPECT those results. After a while, anything is possible and you decide what you do and do not do. Some others refer it to as having complete control of your life.

All of this takes time. You have to train your mind to be on that side of the spectrum until you reach the extreme. Don’t let others tell you otherwise. You are remembered by others by what you DO, not what you don’t do. What you DO is up to you.

Meet Raffaella Fico. That'll Cost You $1.5 Million.

As If I didn’t see this happening.

So look who is also deciding to sell her virginity.

Meet Raffaella Fico.

A gorgeous 20-year old Italian is selling her v-card for the sum of 1 million euros. Yeah, that’s right. 1 million euros. With our crappy economy and currency exchange, that is about $1.5 million US. What does she want to use the money for? You know, the usual. She wants to buy a house and take acting lessons (she was on the Italian version of Big Brother’s last season, so she has aspirations).

In a short word, ridonculous.

I found what Natalie Dylan was doing pretty crazy but at least her money is going to education and college debt. This one just wants money. I mean, think about this. Do you know the kind of life one can have with $1.5 million? I’m pretty sure I could get plenty of 20-year-old Italian virgins with my beachfront property alone without having to buy their v-cards from them.

In a time where money is scarce, this would be the equivalent of purchasing a Ford Edsel.

Credit the picture from Lance’s post about this same topic.

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Monthly Style Inspiration from Jae

I just came across this from Kinowear, a blog devoted to style. Here, he talks about this month's inspirations from some of the top celebrities right now. I'm sure you can find a little bit of you in one of these people. If not, try and create an identity for yourself and associate yourself with one of these people. It's a hell of a start.

Here's the actual blog post.

So what’s the fastest way to improve my image?

Many guys ask me to show them the right path to get on towards finding their best style. One thing I always tell them is to consistently model after stylish people they admire.

Women do this all the time, and it’s the reason why the majority of them look damn good. They look at pictures of the best dressed in the magazines and on the internet, notice how every other woman is dressed out on the streets, and when they’re with friends they are either complimenting them on their fashion, sharing the latest trends, asking each other where they bought this or that, and even spend time shopping together giving each other opinions and what looks good and which things make them look fat.

This is what is really missing with guys, and it sabotages us. In this age, image cannot be an afterthought. We all know how important the impressions we make are in every setting.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression

If you want to become a stylish guy, it doesn’t take a lot effort to start focusing on finding some inspiration to improve. Anytime you see a stylish guy out in the street or restaurant, try to pinpoint and pick out what makes him look good. Take notes in your mind. This is crucial. If it’s his clothes, notice what he’s wearing and how he has put his outfit together. If something is not right, figure out what looks wrong and what he could change to improve. If you’re not already doing this you should start for your own benefit.

If you can’t find any guys to model after in person, there is a plethora of magazines and pictures on the web that you can get inspiration from.

When you see something you like, try to immediately add it to your wardrobe, personality, or appearance.

This is what successful men do, they are always looking to improve themselves in any way.

So let’s get to it.

This Month’s Inspiration

These are some examples that have inspired my clients to add that needed element to their swagger and you can use these examples for yourself now. Maybe something will speak to you, and you’ll go apply it right away.

Known to be bringing back the “gentleman” that’s in all of us, Fonzworth Bentley reminds us that it’s important to hold a certain amount of grace and proper etiquette. He even wrote a book on etiquette and style. Fonzworth is the type of guy that advocates standing up when a woman enters the room.

He should remind us to never throw out your basic manners just because you’re out with close people. That means be aware that spitting, burping, talking with your mouth full, or answering cell phones during a dinner with someone are all things that people will attribute to who you are.

You are what you do. Period.

Be a gentleman around women and they’ll love you for it. Nowadays guys are afraid to say “please,” “excuse me” and “thank you” because they’re afraid it’ll make them seem weak. Being a gentleman means respecting other people, and that does not make you a wuss. So don’t hold off on these things. We all know it’s not what you say, it’s how you’re saying it. If you’re always trying to please people instead of just having a healthy level of respect for your fellow man, that makes you a wuss. But being respectful and showing that you have a concern for other people’s comfort makes you a cool guy.

The Jonas Brothers seem to be more popular than ever because I see their pictures everywhere. I noticed that these boys have some hip style to them and there are some outfits and looks that you may want to steal from them. These guys are definitely dressed by stylists and their use of colors, accessories, and the way they put together their outfits down to the details is something that should be observed carefully.

I’m a fan of Maroon 5, and I laugh whenever I see Adam Levine because he used to be a plain t-shirt and jeans type of guy, and then he really took his image to the next level as his band starting getting more popular. Hey, it’s all about branding right? Anyways, this is a great look that you can steal for a night out to the club this weekend. One thing I’d definitely make sure you own is a solid dark pair of jeans like this which are always more dressier than a lighter pair of jeans or ones that have been distressed. Put away the jeans with holes and crazy washes, and go for something solid and clean to dress up your outfit while keeping it from getting too formal.

I know the “hoodie layered under a jacket” is not a new look, but I just think this outfit Ne-Yo is wearing is so great for a casual night out. This outfit has perfect balance. He’s got a leather jacket that gives him some bad boy edge and lightens it up with subtle color through his matching zip-up hoodie and belt. The hat and the necklace definitely add the right touch of personality. Steal this look for your casual nights out.

Sometimes David Beckham can be too metro for the normal guy’s taste but then there are times where he has the perfect balance of masculinity and feminity. He’s wearing a long sweater coat with a scarf but keeps the masculine balance with his distressed jeans and boots. Remember to keep this type of balance in your outfits. Don’t be afraid to grab “feminine” pieces to add to your wardrobe. Think ahead when purchasing clothes and picture what masculine pieces you can mix it with. I see too many guys just grabbing “masculine” pieces like heavy graphic stuff, and they look too busy and try hard with no class.

This blazer Kanye is wearing still makes him stand out and get noticed, but he doesn’t overdo it. Remember that when you’re wearing a flashy piece like this, you want the rest of your outfit to be very understated and simple.

Pete Wentz is known for always wearing a hoodie, but whenever I see him wearing one it’s loud and fun to match his personality. If you love hoodies, consider getting one in a bright color or cool design. If any part of your personality can relate to this “punk” style, search for some similar hoodies and steal this look.

You should see a picture like this and get inspired to get a velvet blazer. Not inspired? Well it works amazing as a fall jacket that you can wear at anytime of the day. Wear one with a plain shirt and jeans during the day, and with a dress shirt and slacks to an evening party. Very versatile, very elegant.

If you don’t own a pocket square, something is seriously wrong with you. Just kidding. But if you wear a suit to work, even if you don’t wear ties to the office, get a pocket square to add some pizazz to your look. Try it, you’ll be surprised at how many nice compliments you get.

I love wearing dress shirts all the time, but with a pair of slacks and a black belt it could look like you just got off work. In certain settings, this may not be the look you’re going for. All you have to do is get a white belt and open another button if you’re daring and now you look like you’re ready to party. Going straight from the office to meet with friends? Keep a white belt in your car and you have an easy outfit change.

Conclusion

Look for inspiration everywhere you can. People in the street, magazines, music videos, celebrity photos, to advertisements. Great style is everywhere if you keep an eye out for it.