What Can Really Go On in the Men's Room

So, last week, I was with a group of friends eating at Gillette Stadium at a place called SkipJack’s – very good food, by the way. I had to excuse myself and go to the bathroom. Now while I was in the bathroom doing my tinkle thing, my mother called me. Something about the moment made me answer and it was a pretty quick conversation. She just wanted to know if I was coming home tonight.

Then as I was ending the conversation with my mother, I got another call from my job. They had called and were looking to see if I wanted to work or something silly like that. I don’t know why they would call me so late in the night but that’s whatever. Then they were asking me how my promotion was going and what I have learned so far. Like I said, I don’t know about the moment but I was so compelled and passionate about telling him. He was impressed and we had a good conversation.

Realizing where I was, I jetted out of the bathroom and back to join my friends. But before I could, I had one problem. I recently bought these jeans from American Eagle, and I love them. The only problem I am having is getting used to button-fly jeans. They take some time breaking them in. I completely struggle with buttoning these jeans to the point where I was only able to button “the important ones.” After a few more minutes, I was able to leave the bathroom. Of course, I got a ton of comments about what really went on in the bathroom. I found it funny that all of the events happened and it brought smiles to everyone’s faces. I’m good for that.

But having that episode in the men’s room, it made me think of the kinds of internal conversations that we have there. Besides the car, it’s where we do the most internal thinking – unless you’re one to set time aside for meditation. And I feel that it’s important that we take advantage of those times where “being alone” will always happen and do some internal thinking, whether for motivation, planning or just collecting your thoughts. Then I came across this.

There is a new Internet show called the Men’s Room, hosted by Mark Sparks. He is a multi-dimensional talent for some reason I believe that he was a contestant on Keys to the VIP. I’ll have to go back and check that out to confirm. But anyway, he’s done a couple shows and I am excited about the people he is going to have here in the future. There is so much to learn, that I am including it here on my site. Check it out!

Watch this episode above about Frank Kermit. He is someone that any guy can look up to as he provides something I care about a lot. Not just getting the girl. But keeping her.

You can also check the Men's Room website here if you want to see more videos. If I see other episodes worth posting here, better believe you’ll catch it here.

Props to Mark Sparks on this one!

Use Text Messaging to Attract Women? How?

So I have come to realize that text messaging is important to attracting women. People don't have time to talk on the phone these days and so in order to keep the momentum with your favorite lady, your "text game" needs to be on point.

You might be thinking that I am ridiculous. And I probably am, but it's cool. Before I wanted to post this, I wanted to give a little proof as to how important it is these days to be able to say so much with those 140-plus characters. So here it is. A study conducted by AT&T. Thanks to W.David Gardner from InformationWeek.

Some 68% of the respondents to the telecom's survey said they sent a love note via text messaging, and 67% said they used texting to flirt. 

Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy misses girl, so what does he do?

Not too long ago, boy called girl on the telephone or wrote girl a letter to get her back. Today, boy texts girl, gets her back, and boy and girl live happily ever after in high-tech wireless heaven. Sometimes, at least.

That's a new scenario uncovered by AT&T in an extensive survey of text-messaging 1,000 adults ages 18 to 55.

"People have discovered that there are moments when just the right text, sent at just the right time, can go a long way to keeping romance alive," said Alecia Bridgwater, director of messaging for AT&T's wireless unit, in a statement. "We wanted to understand more deeply how our customers were using text messaging in this way, and our study turned up some interesting insights."

For instance, 68% of the respondents said they sent a love note via text messaging, and 67% said they used texting to flirt.

Dee Casey, a frequent texter and AT&T customer from San Antonio, is sold.

"I spend a ton of time texting every day," he said. "I think it's much easier to flirt via text message than in person because you have a moment to think of a cute, flirty, creative response without being embarrassed about what the other person will think."

For couples in established relationships, "thinking of you" is the most common text message sent to their significant others. Some 28% of those surveyed said they text at least three times a day with a significant other or spouse.

The survey did find a few negatives in texting, however. One-third of the respondents said they would be upset if a significant other responded to a wireless transmission while on a date. A total of 84% said that text messages can be misunderstood by a date or suitor.

The survey found that older adults ages 36 to 55 were less likely to text significant others than younger adults, 18 to 35.

But what about a "Dear John" or "Dear Jane" text message sent to inform another person that their relationship is ending? Discreetly, perhaps, the AT&T study didn't discuss that issue. A U.K. study last year of more than 2,000 adults found one in seven respondents was dumped by e-mail or other digital message.

The Pick Up Artist Episode 2: Review

Let me just say that I LOVE the fact that I have this on DVR. There are always some things that you miss when watching it the first time and my article on Episode 1 showed that. So, I am going to be writing each article every week while watching it over again and to include as much things as possible.

Well, with Alex eliminated, all the guys are freaking out. I would call this a reality show moment. And I have also decided to implement a Rian Breakdown Count. We’ll start retroactive to last week. So far the count is 2.

They show up outside of this weird-looking place called the Italian Club. I mean, this place could really be anything. I mean, when I saw it, I thought Subway, but that just might be wrong in other ways. Anyway, as soon as the guys saw the word club, they immediately thought, strippers. What’s up with these guys wanting to meet and talk to strippers? They can barely talk to normal people in bars. How do they possibly think that they would be able to talk to what I would consider amongst the Queens of Pickup? And do you think Mystery would embarrass himself and everyone else by putting them in a hopeless situation of that magnitude? Doubtful. This is certainly not a strip club. I actually thought was going to be a nursing home.

Anyway, Mystery wants these guys to start understanding the importance of building long-lasting confidence. It’s not just about the clothes. It’s just one part. You when you open your mouth, you have to stay congruent. Would be nice for some guys to just look good and never have to open their mouths and still get with women but that’s just not the case, guys.

Mystery implements his first reward challenge where all you have to do make as many good first-impressions as possible with these women. They run in there and all they see are old women playing bingo. Priceless. I love how the older women’s eyes lit up at the sight of fresh virgin meat. I thought that was funny as well.

Here’s where I can put in something important. I’ll make it bold and wrap it in some quotations. This you should read.

I think that night game is much more difficult than day game. And I agree with most pick up artists out there that say that if you can get through night game, then day game will be easy. But I also think it’s important, not to forget about day game. It’s much more relaxed and it’s an easier way to slowly build confidence and make connections. I read all the time that guys don’t think they will find the One at a bar or nightclub. And to an extent, you are right. You are most likely able to find the One in a supermarket or a bookstore or even a coffee shop. But don’t overlook the club or bar though. Unless you are at a yoga studio or another place where you have access to large amounts of women, the clubs and bars are going to be your places to go.

So these guys get into things and some do well, others did terribly. I thought Simeon was too fake. He had high energy but he didn’t mean any of what he said and it doesn’t matter how old women are – they are going to notice. Brian was just too much for them and he came off as weird and rude at times. The comment where he says, “I love how you guys stink,” was just silly and mean. Although when he referred to these older women as sabertooths, I found that pretty funny. Then there’s Kevin, who I figured out what about him is missing from his game. He has no social awareness – at all. His comment about old people having stories (from World War II) was just terrible. I hope he was just kidding but something tells me he wasn’t and that worries me, considering I thought of him to be one of the favorites. He struggled.

The winner ended up being Matt, the self-proclaimed Jewish party schmoozer and the superstar I mistook for Carl (I guy I thought I knew). He has great social skills (in a low pressure environment) and that showed today. Now if he could only transfer those skills to attracting women.

So Mystery, finally gives his first lesson: Approaching and Openers

He says that it’s important to do indirect openers in the lounges. And it’s funny to hear Mystery says these things and I just know everything about it. It also helps that I have read his book about the Venusian Arts.

“Did you see the fight outside?”

“Who lies more? Men or women?”

So typical.

Anyway, one thing that Mystery mentions that I think is important when it comes to understand how this works is his talk about a hook point.

Hook points are the points where the set you are interacting with doesn’t want you leave. I mean, it should give you a good feeling. Imagine that – people think you’re cool so they want you to stick around. Now using a false time constraint (FTC) can reinforce this.

“I only have a couple minutes because I have to meet up with my friends who are looking for me.”

Also looking like you’re ready to leave is another way of showing an FTC. Body language is key here because you have to show that you are only here for the interaction and to share this question/story really quickly before you go off about your business.

Mystery also mentions negging, which is saying something that disqualifies the woman you’re talking to from being a potential mate. It works with certain types of women. I find that it’s unnecessary most of the time. But when I do use them, it’s fun and playful and women get it. So I think negging is a personal choice.

On a side note, Matador’s comment about pickle juice is just dumb. What an idiot. Although, that would only work for Brian. So I’m sure he’s going to use it when he’s out there.

Matt receives Mystery’s secret accessory, his boa. It’s a trademark for him and it is pretty easy to get people to approach you (remember Alex’s chain?). You can use it as a lock-in prop, which is essentially a prop you use to create a connection with a woman. You can wrap it around her, or have her hold on to it. But once that connection is made, you’re in pretty good standing because she’ll always remember that connection with you and since it was a good one, she’ll be likely to talk to you. I never really carry lock-in props, since I am always carrying my camera, flip-cam and my iPhone. But lock-in props do work. I’ll share a story about how I came across one during the night and it worked like magic in a post later this week.

So the contest that night was about using those openers. They were going to be judged by how well they executed their openers and how successful they were able to get hooking points from their sets.

Brian ended up winning the challenge, which I thought was pretty cool. He did deserve it for that night. But then he freaked out about choose two wingmen. Just choose two people you like. It’s so early that it’s not even that important.

Rian has another breakdown somewhere here so the Rian Breakdown Count is up to 3.

Anyway, I understood why Kevin got eliminated over Carl. Kevin just has no social awareness. It’s just awful. And to think, I considered him a favorite. This just comes to show you that you need to have social awareness. That will come with being out there getting interactions with people as much as you can.

One thing that I also wanted to point out were the medallions. This week’s medallion was the Burkanan, which meant re-birth and new life. Here’s a site that goes into it in more detail. Clearly this is true for these guys as they are about to get into world they’ve never been before and truly find out who they are as people. “The beginning of a new life.”

Business is picking up.

What an Interesting Way To Make A Difference

I was really fortunate to get a ticket to this special event. The event was already sold out and I missed out on not only the first batch but also the second batch of tickets. Out of nowhere, the released another 15 tickets. Once I heard this, I impatiently waited to finish work and then raced home to order one. When I did, there were about 7 left. I am so glad I went.

Almost one week ago, I was at the Harvard Club…as a valet. They were celebrating 100 years at the Harvard Club. Being me, I had an appreciation of the exclusivity of the venue. It was cool and the place looked awesome with paintings of historical figures such as JFK. To show up the next week, actually walking into the place to BE there was something special within itself. A couple of the people there who saw me last week recognized me and had that surprised look as if they were thinking, “what are you doing here? Are you looking for someone or are you lost?” Anyway, I digress.

The SM4SC event was awesome. I got to meet up with some great twitter friends, and meet some really, really cool people. There was great conversation going on everywhere and there was so much to learn here. I got to learn a lot about other people’s ideas and really appreciated the ideas that we all shared.

Another REALLY cool thing that happened to me was that I won something from the raffle! I tried to wait ‘til the end of this post but I couldn’t hold it much longer. I was fortunate enough to win a full pass to tomorrow’s New Marketing Summit at Gillette Stadium in Foxboro, Massachusetts. It is going to be awesome and I can’t wait. Once again, I have to thank Adam Cohen (@adamcohen) for giving up the prize (since he already had a pass to go) and Chris Brogan (@chrisbrogan) for donating the prize. I got to talk to him today and thanked him for giving me this opportunity. I hope I get to talk to him for a longer time tomorrow during the summit. If you don’t know who Chris Brogan is, you should find out.

But what was the point of all this? Well to have fun but for a great cause. All the proceeds are going to Jane Doe Inc., which is the Massachusetts Coalition Against Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence. This is actually one of the issues that has been hiding under the radar with all the “other” issues going on. I think it’s important that we don’t forget the issues that start in the home. I strongly suggest that you make a donation to Jane Doe.

But there are some really good speeches that I want you to check out.

This one is of Mike Davis (@globalcitizen), a power representative of Empressr, a rich media presentation tool (that I think is pretty cool). He talks how he got here with a paper clip.



The next one is from Gradon Tripp (@gradontripp). Quoted to be the brainchild of Social Media for Social Change, he explains how the power of social media can do great things. You can check out SM4SC here.



This one is from Toni, from Jane Doe, Inc. She talks about Jane Doe and how hard they fight to help victims of sexual and domestic abuse.



And my man, Oz Sultan (@ozsultan) just gives a few brief words on how we can help. You can check out his site here.



This is just the beginning as it looks to turn out to be a great thing we have here.

You can check out some of the photos here. There are tons more ALL over Flickr.

Nothing Can Be Better Than This!

What an amazing week that I just had! Project Infinity has been asleep for the past few days and that's because I have been running around being crazy, talking to as many people as possible and sharing ideas. What I have learned in this past week is something I could have never learned in my 5 years in college.

Because I am behind in my posts, I am going to post my "notes" and comments while I was there. The videos I have are too big, so I am going to have to break them down and upload them piece by piece. That will take forever so I will have to let you know when I post them. It will be a follow-up to this post.

So here is my set of comments and thoughts:

As day one of the New Marketing Summit comes to an end, I would like to share thoughts. But before I even do that, I have some quick comments that I think everyone here would agree with.

I like the quick pace of the panels and discussions. It’s been great and although some people would have liked more time, the amount of information that has been given is tremendous. I have so much going on in my head and although it’s a bit overwhelming, it’s not too much for me to lose.

There needs to be a constant flow of coffee, tea and soda here! There’s no going around it. How can you have a conference and not have caffeine around to keep us awake. Despicable. But hopefully that will change tomorrow. Just in case, I am bringing a huge thing of tea and vitamin water with me.

Ok, now that’s out of the way, I just wanted to say how fortunate I am to be able to go to something like this and meet some of the brain children of some major marketing companies that work social media like champs! There have been really good presentations here and one that was really good for me was the “Millenial Marketing Movers” panel, ran by Ben Grossman (@BenGrossman), Emily Belyea, Rebecca Corliss (@repcor) and Matt Peters. They are all around my age and seeing them up there made me realize that we, as the next generation, hold so much power. Ben was right. By 2010, we are going to out number the Baby-Boomers. That’s just crazy to think about, but it’s true. And the great thing about what I would like to do is that my audience is around my age. And with that focus, I have to keep in mind that, what I like and want will most likely be similar to what everyone else likes and wants. It’s just a matter of producing content and generating discussion for people to be intrigued by and want to participate in. So that has me excited!

This one is from day two at the summit. You'll be able to tell that I was full of excitement:

Let me just say that as I hang out and listen to a panel about Email Marketing, I had to write this post. I seriously can’t contain this excitement. My face just might fall off! This is great. I LOVE meeting people! Now although, I knew this already, it’s great when you ACTUALLY get to meet people.

The amount of people that I have met over the past two days is astronomical. In hindsight, it might not be as much, BUT the experience of meeting these people is something that I’ll never forget. Coming to this New Marketing Summit has been another great decision that I have made in my life.

This is something that I have to reinforce time and time again. We are capable of meeting great people if you actually just take the chance and go out there. You are your own brand. Your brand is [insert name here]. Market the hell out of it and make it the best damn brand out there. How? Well, you gotta put yourself out there, whether on the internet or in-person. Make every experience an enjoyable one with whoever you come across. You will have so much fun and you will gain an incredible social circle of people that WANT to talk to you and know who you are! Imagine that! People WANTING to know who YOU are! It’s crazy, I know but it’s true and it works.

I have videos here to post as well. One major one was by Glenn Gaudet (@glenng), CMO of Podcast.com. He helped me realize the best way to kick-start my Podcast, which is coming VERY SOON!

This is a VERY exciting time for me as you will see. I am excited to take Project Infinity to the next level!

Thanks to everyone who has helped me. To everyone that I have met:

YOU ALL ROCK!

New Marketing Summit @ Gillette Stadium Update

So after a much needed lunch (although there didn't seem to be enough food), I am quickly reporting an update from the New Marketing Summit. There have been some great people going up on stage and talking about social media marketing.

One person in particular being Freddie Laker, who seems to have the skinny on the future of Social Media. That gets me excited.

There was also a quick demo if the Burn Facebook App, which sparked tons of ideas from me.

Like I said, there will be photos and videos coming but toward the end.

Oh, Chris Brogan is talking! Gotta run...

New Marketing Summit @ Gillette Stadium

So I am at the New Marketing Summit at Gillette Stadium and this is incredible. Besides the fact that this is my first time at the Patriots House, what I am seeing here is incredible. I got to meet Chris Brogan (@chrisbrogan) within minutes of getting here! I got to sit front row and listen to some of the coolest people talk about how to make my brand better and more! I got to see some very cool videos as well, which I will post later on.

I have been recording for most of the time here and plan on continuing that trend. I will post throughout the day with tons of news and material so stay tuned!

Now, I must go socialize and hang out with people!

The Pick Up Artist Episode 1: Review

Well, it’s finally back. After having to wait over a year for the long-awaited second season, it’s here. This actually was the show that gave me so much momentum in my decision to better myself, besides Scott Baio and Rock of Love. I still find it weird that these shows made the difference for me, but there was a lot going on in each of these shows that I felt were very important to understand in order to better me.

I have been holding back comments because I was able to see the whole episode about two days before the premiere. For some reason, through my research on the web, I’m able to come across a lot of information that very few people find until it hits the mainstream. But anyway, now that it’s Monday and people have seen it, I’d like to talk about a few things.

It also helps that I have the episode DVR’d and can really do a bunch of critical instant replays that are worth noting.

Having read Mystery’s book, it’s funny to see how they portray his life story of “lovable loser” to “alpha seducer.” I mean, it is true, but Mystery hasn’t changed much. Yeah, he learned a system of how to meet and attract women that revolutionized the game. I mean, come on, if you are interested in meeting and attracting women, then you have heard of Mystery. There’s no avoiding it. But, in the end it’s a system and he’s still the same person at heart, but with peacocking gear and routines for a lifetime. I truly believe it. But it will still be interesting to see if his game can still work in a world where he and his routines are more known.

One thing to note is when you see him take off his gear when he goes into the bar, you realize that it’s just him (I would also note that Matador didn’t take off his gear). I wouldn’t consider it hiding behind an avatar. What he does so well is emphasizing what’s great about him, ignoring what isn’t so great about him, and creating a sense of suspense and mystery (no pun intended) which is what to do if you want to attract a woman initially.

But anyway, I digress. When I saw the scene with all of those ladies hanging out at the pool, my first thought was, “I want that.” Nope, I wasn’t talking about the women. There was so much more going on there. Owning a place like that, being able to invite people over and most importantly, being able to share these things with others. The fact that Mystery gets to help change these guys lives is something special. Yeah, it may be a reality show, but their lives will forever be different. Well, maybe Alex’s will be the same. But teaching others is something that I aspire to do sometime soon.

I’m not sure how Tara is supposed to be a step up from J-Dog. Yeah, J-Dog had no personality but just because Tara is a woman doesn’t make her more marketable. I actually don’t even think she’s as hot as others think. She seems genuine but it doesn’t work well with the alpha nature of Mystery and Matador. In fact, it seems a little awkward and doesn't make her look good at all. Speaking of which, Matador looks like he’s on steroids. But I’ll give him some props for “upgrading” his look with...wait, I take that back - no props. Unfortunately, the only thing I like about him is his “alpha” presence. If there’s anything you could learn from him, it’s his “alpha” nature – his posture, voice, confidence and overall swagger.

So, the guys are pretty much your typical average frustrated chumps. A few are virgins, some haven’t kissed a girl before, some could be gay and others are doomed to the friend zone. There are a few front-runners and some who should have been cut right alongside Alex.

Todd seems like he can do pretty well if he just wasn’t so open to being the emotional outlet - grounds for friend zone. He has the necessary looks and energy to draw women and I’m sure he’s interesting BUT he’s missing that one thing that will make him attractive. I think he’ll find it really soon. But for now, he is the emotional outlet.

Rian is the next Prahdeep. I can already tell he’s going to be an ass to the rest of the group and cause hell. But we’ll see. Even Prahdeep was good enough to understand the game and play well. I don’t think Rian has that ability.

Simeon is just too hyperactive. Too much energy can destroy a set because he comes off as creepy and too try hard. If he tones it down, he’ll be pretty cool. That “boat game” he has will be awesome for him in the future.

Carl looks like he’s going to be a superstar. He reminds me of someone I know. Plus, I have a soft heart for cheaters so I’m definitely pulling for him. Any guy that is great but gets taken advantage of because he’s not in the know, is someone that I pull for automatically. I want them to realize their potential and prove to everyone that looked past them or treated them poorly how big of a mistake they made. But I guess I see a little bit of myself in them too. Plus, that gap in his teeth and the Austin Powers hair are priceless.

Greg is that nerd we all love. He’s cool but just needs to get out of his shell - and a makeover. It’ll take him about 2 episodes before he gets a kiss close.

Bryan is that goof ball that I talked about in one of my previous post. He has potential (and it’s cool that they have a couple Asians on here) but something about him is throwing me off. Once he learns to relax, get comfortable in his skin and enjoy the moment, I think he'll do well.

Kevin looks like he could win this. He seems to be pretty well rounded but is just missing that “thing” that takes him to the top. He is definitely someone I would pay attention to throughout this season.

Alex was DOA. I can’t believe VH1 dared to put this guy on. I don’t blame Mystery for booting him before the season starts. Any more time on him would have been a waste. This will come off as mean but listen. Alex would have required more work than all of them combined. From mannerisms to speech to body to everything – it just wouldn’t have been worth the effort. Maybe for personal or 1-to-1 training, but not for a reality show. Best of luck to Alex.

I think what all of these guys are missing from what I saw are just things to say that are interesting. Routines and such will solve those issues. We’ll see how well they learn next week. But there is a lesson to be learned in this episode:

Creating an Avatar.

Dictionary definition: an incarnation, embodiment, or manifestation of a person or idea.

Take a look at yourself in the mirror and look deep within yourself. Close your eyes and find every great (not just good) thing about yourself. Store all of those things in a box that represents your soul. Now once you have all those great things in that box. I want you feel your body implode. Start feeling your body and mind get sucked into this box. Soon, you’ll realize that there’s nothing left but this box and somehow you got sucked in with it. Now imagine this box exploding. Think of all of those great things just exploding out of this box. Such fire, such passion, such flare, such power are all coming out of this box. Think of the clothes that represent that power. Think of the attitude, the mindset, the posture, the walk that represents all of these great things about you. Now open your eyes.

That first image you see of yourself when you first open your eyes in front of that mirror will be your avatar. Go with it!

I won’t repeat myself here. I have an entire series that’s on going about how to improve your look from head to toe. Here is my article about your head and the other about your upper body. The lower body will be coming by the end of the week.

Anyway, the makeovers that the guys did were pretty good. They seemed a little tame compared to the last season and some of the fashion trends seemed out of date. The vests? Don’t make me laugh. There is one guy that I know that can rock a vest like it’s still in fashion and it’s not Matador. But we’ll see how their outfits improve over the course of the season. I’m sure it’ll get better.

Some pretty fun parts:

Kevin’s comment about the swamp ass.

The 40-year-old virgin scene with Matt. It just reminded me how funny that movie was. Not how funny that scene was.

The “cool enough” comment Matador made. There was just something about it that reminded me of a comment I made similar to that drawing the same reaction. A comment like that is killer if you can pull it off well.

I am already excited about next week. I’ll keep doing this every Monday night. Feel free to post your own comments about the show or about my comments here.

The one thing about Mystery that I will always remember is what he always says:

“It’s not just about picking up women. It’s about building a life.”

In a Video for Text 2 Land Technology and Perkett PR

So, I've always had this small dream of being in a video that a considerable amount of people would get to see. Don't know why, but I just like to do things like that - I think it's fun.

Last week, my dream finally came true. Thanks to Christine Major (Twitter @CMajor) and Jeff Glasson (Twitter @jeffglasson), a couple of my friends and I participated in a video promoting this "new" thing called, "Text to Landline."

If you haven't realized this already most wireless carriers will allow you to send a text message to your house phone. It's pretty cool. I won't spill the details because all of it is explained in the video. So take a look, enjoy and leave comments if you want.

You can see it on YouTube here.

The Transformation Part 2 - Upper Body

So this is a continuation of my series about doing the total transformation “from head to toe.” You can check the first part, the head, here. So let’s get back into it!

The thing about the upper body is that like the head, it’s going to be one of the more prominent things that someone will notice about you. He looks muscular/in-shape. Does he workout? Is he wearing a nice shirt/jacket? What does his chain say? It looks interesting. That watch is cool – I wonder where he got that?

These are just some of the questions that people will think about when they see you walking down the street or into a room. Of course, you want them to ask these things in a good way. Hell, maybe you'd like them to actually approach and talk to you. Well here are some tips that can get you to looking your best.

Before I go into clothing and accessories, one thing is universal. You must involve yourself in some type of physical activity. Workout, play basketball, go running, anything. In order to look healthy, you must make the effort to actually be healthy. I am not talking about changing your entire nutrition and start eating only vegetables and fruits. I mean, eating some can help but that’s not the point. We all have these excuses about why we can’t do something. Get that out of your head and make a game plan of some sort. If you’re looking to lose weight, then go running, eat better food and do some stretching and exercises. If you’re looking to gain weight (mostly muscle), eat “power” foods, lift weights, do some running and lift more weights. If you like how you look, then you already know what you did to get you there. Just commit to yourself to maintain your look. Theirs is nothing less attractive than a man who cannot take care of himself. Even worse if he can’t maintain his look.

After you get that part under your belt, you should determine what body style you have and adapt your clothing to that. There are three pretty general body types that you could categorize yourself under: Muscular, Heavier and Trim. Of course there are in-betweens but if you look more like one than the other, you should just stick to that category. You either do that or workout your way into the category that you want.

Let me just preface again by saying I am not an expert but will help you with what I know. If anyone has anything to contribute, please be my guest to add comments.

Muscular – if you have a more muscular upper body, clearly you can opt to show it off or hide it and leave it as a surprise for the ladies later on. Either way, you’re going to want to do it right. For muscular guys you are going to want clothing that fits you on the tighter side, I’m not talking Under Armour here. But because you have the muscular build, your body will fill out the shirts much more, accentuating your body. If you wear bigger clothes you’re body is going to get washed out and you’ll look like you’re literally swimming in your shirts.

T-Shirts and Graphic Tees will be your best friend because you can pull it off the best. If you’re looking for some good tees, check out PleaseDressMe. It’s a great search engine for any kind of tee you want. Guaranteed, you’ll find something there.

For great button downs, there are plenty of places you can go. AskMen.com has some great reviews on some trendy button-downs. In fact, here's a good article that I think is worth looking at. I personally have been going to Express Men and they have some great shirts that can look good on almost anyone.

You also have the luxury of wearing tight-fitting shirts. Sometimes when done the wrong way, it can look pretty stupid so if you are jacked, don’t wear a shirt two sizes too small. You’ll look like my buddy at Halloween when he wore a Spider-Man costume – in Medium (Child). You have to realize that it’s not attractive. But on the same note, having a tighter-fitting shirt that looks like you didn’t have help putting it on makes you look good. If you’re going to do that, it would be preferable to wear darker colors.

Trim – if you are a lean guy then you can pull of some of the best outfits out there, in my opinion. There are so many options and looks for you that you can’t really go wrong with many of them. Normally I wouldn’t suggest wearing slim-fitting clothing but I’ve been really thinking that it actually looks good for some people. I wouldn’t go Under Armour tight but slim fit is the way to be. Shirts, tee and button downs – slim fit. But the thing is, you almost have to wear things that are slim because anything bigger and you’ll easily look like you’re swimming. American Eagle, Gap, J.Crew, Urban Outfitters and again, PleaseDressMe are great places to check out for great looking slim fit tops.

Heavier – If you are a heavier guy, you’re going to want to stay away from slim fit and tight fitting anything AT ALL COSTS! Since I am not a bigger guy, I wouldn’t know what really works but I do know that for some of my uncles who are ridiculously tall, Casual Male is their store of choice.

Now for accessories, wouldn't recommend going out, trying to look like Mystery (a great PUA and a pioneer at that - much respect), with the big top hat and goggles, the rings, the boa and all that stuff – I feel like only HE can pull it off and it works for him - exceptionally well. Just find some cool things that you’d like to wear. And it just doesn’t include those things. It includes things that you would actually be interested in, like watches, sport coats, jackets, sunglasses and those things that you might find everyday use in. I’ll briefly break it down for you.

For watches, if you can afford it, have two watches. One to wear during the day and one to rock out at night. If you can afford a third, make that third a very special one that you pull out for VERY special events.

For chains or necklaces, find one and stick with it. Wear it all the time. Find one that associates you will your identity. Mine is a silver pendant with the infinity symbol engraved on it. People grab it all the time and it’s a nice center focus to your chest. If you can find meaning in a piece of jewelry, you already have a conversation and a bigger chance of connection with whom you’re talking to.

Sport jackets and coats are givens. Have a few of each and in a variety of colors. I would probably go with a black, a navy and a more outstand color like white or a more reserved like brown. Same thing goes for coats. Go for a pea coat, a leather jacket and something crazy like a suede jacket or a cashmere pullover. With these items, you want to use them to encourage people touching you. You’ll be surprised how many people love touching things – just an excuse to touch you.

As for hats, wristbands, rings and all that, you are going to want to keep that stuff to a minimum. I would personally leave it to just one accessory per limb. But if you think you can pull it off, then by all means go for it. Find out what works for you.

Now, I am going to be honest. Because of my lack of knowledge with fashion, I found it perfectly acceptable to ask people who work in the stores you shop in to help you out. They will give you honest opinions and make you look good. And when you try clothes on, go out of the dressing room and ask people what they think about your clothes. They’ll give you honest opinions. These are the kinds of random people you are going to meet anyway so why not see what kind of first impression you give?

This is all for the best and making you look for best. In the next installment, we are going to do the lower body and figure out what kinds of stuff you should get.

Potential has no limit.