You have to go left before you can go right.And get engaged.
So many of you have been wondering about my engaged client. The interesting thing about him is he went through TWO breakups during the time he worked with me.
Imagine that. I had to help him get over a breakup TWICE -- and now he’s engaged.
Originally, he came to me because he had just got out of a long-term relationship and didn’t know what to do and where to go from there. Over a glass of wine, I decided I was going to take him under my wing (pun intended).
He thought time would allow him to get over his ex-girlfriend but it didn’t work. I told him, “of course it didn’t. You weren’t DOING anything so all you could do was think about her.”
Eventually, after being nagged by his good friend, he decided to work with me. At that point, I told him he had to do two things.
One was to do EXACTLY what I told him and the other was to journal the entire process.
He agreed. And then I owned him.
But in all seriousness, over a matter of a few weeks, I helped him...
- Discover, understand and get over the mental walls that were holding him back from moving on (i.e., “I’m not good enough for any woman,” “I won’t be able to find anyone as good or better than her...”).
- Create a strategic game plan to rediscover the things he enjoys doing, rebuild his lifestyle and reconnect with his social networks.
- Redevelop his social skills to be able to start attracting other women.
- Fine-tune his lifestyle in a way that makes it easy for a woman to be involved without him having to give up the things that make him who he is.
Literally within one month, his life was back on track, he met a woman while out with a few friends and was exclusively dating her.
I was thinking to myself, “Wow, that was too easy...”
For a couple months, everything was going great and it looked like they were on the verge of a long-term commitment.
In fact, he was telling me he was falling for her very quickly...
Then, a few months later, I received an email from him, saying that she dumped him “out of nowhere.”
He was crushed, just like he was only a few months ago.
So, we went back to the drawing board, doing the exact same thing we did before -- he did what I said, journaled it and found the woman of his dreams.
This time, they dated for several months and eventually, he proposed to her.
The funny thing about this is when he told me how he did it, he said of all the moments we had working together that were so difficult, asking her to marry him was the easiest thing he’s ever done.
Just getting the email with only, “Thomas -- we’re engaged,” made my day.
You’ll never know how strong the ripple effects will be from what you do for people.
And in this case, helping him move on from his previous relationships was the key to him being able to meet someone that he will eventually marry.
I can’t wait to get that invite...
But this made me think about the difficulty people have when recovering from a breakup. It’s a VERY lonely process and one you don’t truly know how to deal with.
I really want to share as much of my strategies as possible. For example, sharing the true story of my breakup was something I wanted to do because it came from first-hand experience and know people can relate to.
I want to help you get over your breakup without issues and the whole reason I write is to help as many of you who are willing to take the leap.
But here’s where it gets interesting. I can’t help everyone -- there’s just not enough time to do that. However, if I could pick a group of people who have a great chance of being successful, it would be SO worth it.
My client promised to do everything I told him to do (and he knew if he didn’t, I would have stopped working with him). He knew I was going to push him WAY past his comfort zone but he went with it. He put his utmost trust and faith in me.
And now, he’s engaged and happier than ever.
So, let me ask you...
How many of you would be interested in coaching, specifically for help getting over an ex or a recent breakup?
I’m not entirely sure how I would do it or what it would look like but I know for right now, the most effective way has been from working one-on-one with people who are serious and dedicated to creating change in their lives.
And now that one of my clients is now engaged, I can share the specific strategies I used to help him and others get there.
However, unlike my normal services, this is something that I won’t be able to offer as a regular service.
So, if you are interested in something like this, send me an email and tell me what this would do for your life. How would you use it to get over your breakup? How would you use it to find someone else to date? How would you hold yourself accountable?
Shoot an email to me at firstname.lastname@example.org and put “Breakup Recovery 1:1” in the subject.
For more of a real-time response, you can shoot me a message on Twitter.
I’ll let you know what I find out after I look through the emails.