Tough Love #10: Is He "It?"

This continues my posts of Tough Love, a series of posts, giving direct advice to women based on the weekly VH1 show, Tough Love. If you have missed out on other posts, feel free to check out the other ones.



Week 1: Creating a First Impression

Week 2: Communication

Week 3: Being Sexy

Week 4: Daddy & Dating

Week 5: The Wow Factor

Week 6: Date Crimes

Week 7: What's Your Price?

Week 8: Reconciling the Past With the Present

Week 9: Love Will Find You. But When?

Week 10: Is He "It?"

The honeymoon phase is over. Now, things are real. How do you know if he is legit? In all honesty, no one can really tell you that. Not even me.

It’s all in your gut.

There may be only a couple of times in your life where you’ll have the feeling he is the person you’d want to spend the rest of your life with. Sometimes we’re wrong. Other times, we’re right.

Either way, the least you can do is ask yourself - and maybe him - a few questions to feel more certain.

How much are you willing to give him? What are you willing to do for him? If it’s short of everything, chances are, you’re not there yet.

Have both of you fully put yourself out there? Is all of the dirty laundry out? Have both your pasts been reconciled? The last thing you want is to think everything has been said and then you find out something MAJOR has been omitted. Put it all out there. Make sure you get the same.

Do you know what he is willing to do for you? Once again, if it’s short of everything, is it satisfactory?

Speaking of which, do you still love him despite him not meeting your every need?Bending is very different from breaking and many times, you’ll have to bend for true love. A simple example could be having a long-distance relationship. A more complicated example is being with a man who has a child (or children).

We all get nervous about someone being “it.” In a world that’s filled with doubt, negativity and infidelity, how can anyone blame you?

But in the end, all you have is your intuition and if you can get some of the questions answered above, you’ll be more at ease moving on with someone and happier, bringing your dating life to a close, and your love life to a new beginning.