A recent conversation with a friend has inspired me to share something I do with my clients that has helped them and will help many people out there who are playing the dating field.
If you’re going on dates with multiple people, it can be hard to keep track of everything. Sometimes you may forget where you went with someone, what you wore or if you are dating online, which dating site you originally met someone. When you are in pursuit in figuring out what you want, it requires a considerable amount of work. Why not make it as efficient as possible?
If my clients are going on dates with multiple people, I have them create a dating worksheet.
This worksheet is not only a way to help you remember certain things about someone, but it also tells you your dating progress. The worksheet works something like this.
The people you are dating are divided into three ranks - A-List, B-List and C-List.
Requirements: must have gone on at least THREE dates AND be commitment potential.
Your A-List will have VERY few people on it. It might not have any. But these people are amongst the few you would consider having a committed relationship with. Of your Attention and Investment Pie (AI pie), these people will take up about 65% of it.
Requirements: must have gone on ONE date AND are planning to see them again
If you are going on dates with many people, chances are you’ll have a good amount of people on this list. At the very least, you’ll be having a second date. These people will take up about 30% of your AI pie.
Requirements: must have a plan to date them
This list will have many people on it. You plan on dating them but nothing has really happened yet. You should be spending little to NO time with these people - about 5% of your AI pie. These could also be people who love the cat and mouse game a little too much and are just not that into you.
You DO NOT need to make outwardly attempts to reach out to these people. If they’ve made the list, chances are you’ve already reached out to them. Let them reach out to you and earn a piece of your pie.
You can make columns for whatever information you deem important. The important thing that should be in EVERY worksheet is the stock up / stock down columns. These columns will gauge not only your perception of your dates but also your confidence with them. One column will determine if they are winning you over and the other will if you think you’re winning them over. Both columns will vary date to date and week to week. Your dates can also move from the A-List to the B-List and vice-versa. Remember, it’s all about tracking your progress (or regress).
The interesting thing about all of this is you’ll really be able to tell if you’re making headway in figuring out what you want, finding the right people and how your confidence fluctuates. On top of it all, you’ll be better able to manage your dating life.
If you’d like more assistance in creating your own worksheet, send me an email.
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