5 Ways to NOT Be Creepy

Don't be this guy.Editor's Note: This piece is by Nick Notas, our Boston Wingman Strategist and Confidence Coach. You can read more of his pieces at The Dating Specialist.

Once a woman has filed you under creepy, it’s damn near impossible to change her mind.

When meeting a woman, it’s important she’s comfortable because if she feels nervous, it’ll put her on the defensive.

That’s why I’m such a huge advocate of making the best first impression possible.

Most times, conveying you’re a normal guy is as simple as avoiding some common mistakes.

Below are five ways you can make sure your interactions start on the right foot.

Standing too close

Personal space is important and getting too close too soon can make people weary.

When meeting a woman and facing her directly, give her at least two feet of space. Anything closer is considered a “personal” or “intimate” zone (See chart here).

As you build a stronger connection, you’ll be able to get more personal without it feeling threatening.

The exception to the rule is when standing to the side of her. You can stand closer (almost shoulder to shoulder) without it being so confrontational. This is a great way to generate an intimate connection without making things awkward.

Appeal to the senses

Look good, smell good, sound good, taste good, and you’ll feel good. Don’t underestimate the power of a fresh shirt, breath mints, and a shower before heading out. Seriously, I’ve talked to a lot of women and it’s an instant turn-off to be with a guy who doesn’t take care of himself.

Have strong eye contact when appropriate

Holding good eye contact is a sign of confidence and shows you’re listening attentively. Just remember to periodically look away for a couple of seconds to not seem too intense. Staring a girl down will make her feel nervous, uncomfortable, and even like she’s being judged.

Use animated facial expression and smile

I understand the anxiety of meeting a woman, but you have to make sure your face doesn’t reflect your nervousness. Avoid looking strained or just blank by listening to her and not over-thinking what to say next. It doesn’t let her warm up to you and feel relaxed when talking.

Be more animated with your facial expressions and remember to smile. You’ll look more friendly and confident.

Don’t linger with your touches and know her limits

When initially touching a woman, be careful not to keep your hand on her for too long.  It pains me to see guys make a joke, put their hand on a woman’s shoulder, and leave it there. It’s just a dead weight and draws uncomfortable attention.

Instead, make your physical contact brief and save the longer stuff for later.

Also, if you go to touch a woman and she backs off or seems uneasy, pull away. This is a sign that she’s not ready to move forward. Stay lighthearted, continue flirting, build more trust, and try again in a bit.

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