Complete Analysis of Men Trying to "Pick Up" Women

So, like I said, I am going to talk about every interaction on VH1’s the Pickup Artist. These guys go out on challenges and interact with women. The commentary Mystery gives is not in-depth enough (considering the time constraint – I’m sure he could talk for hours). So, this is where I come in. You can see my review of Episode 2 here.

Here is the rundown of every interaction these guys had and I’ll point out what was great and not so great about the interaction.

Matt has some great confidence about him, which I expect. Then a woman approached him and said, “That’s hot.” He did some creepy thing with the boa and said thank you. End game.

Listen, when a woman approaches you and says something, they are putting themselves out there to connect with you. Women don’t have to do that because they have so many guys putting themselves out there for them. So far them to do that clearly shows that they may be attracted to you. You have to take advantage of that and start a conversational thread. You have to. If someone gave you keys to a Ferrari, are you going to say thank you and not take it? Extreme example, I know but it can equate to the same magnitude of missing out if you don’t jump on these signs of interest.

Another girl approaches him and it works for only a couple of seconds and it fizzles. Why? He lets the girl wear it for only a few seconds and then takes it back saying, “it looks better on me.” How is that making her feel good? Make her hold on to it. If she runs away, she runs away. It’s a boa! What value does it have to you? He just got it from Mystery. Come on. He would have to expect a friend to jump in there and save her. He wasn’t being nice to her at all.

Todd goes in and asks a woman, “would you go on the Montell Williams show?” It’s a good one, but I was interested to see where he was going to go with this. He smiles and it was money. Then he says, “you know, when you smile, your nose wiggles a bit.” A great neg. Makes any honest woman subconscious about it because you’re pointing out something that you notice about her. If you follow it with, “it’s cute.” Then she’s not going to feel offended by it. She’s actually going to love it because something that she may feel insecure about is not something that a guy likes about her. Right away, he uses a false-time constraint (FTC), “seriously, I have to go join my friends in a second.” Then she says that she found his piercing sexy, a clear indication of interest (IOI). You can just run with it at that point. Then he’s able to get a free drink from the woman. Pretty solid interaction if you ask me. Cheers!

Greg jumps right into a set and talks about how he sparred with Andy Dick. Probably not the best opener. You could definitely save it for later when you are trying to demonstrate social value (DHV) to a group, but not right at the beginning. It sounds too absurd to be true and it actually doesn’t make sense in the interaction. The woman will have no idea how to respond to that. Which is why the woman asked him, “so, what was the point of that story?” Nothing much you can do at that point.

So jumps right into another set. I was able to pause it and check out his body language. The women look at him, he’s looking away with his body at a ¾ turn. His posture is upright, chest out and chin up. It is perfect! The definition of the “alpha” position.

“What do you think about tattoos on girls?” Another solid question you could ask anyone. The Name Tattoos routine is a great conversational starter. Don’t believe me? Ask this very same question to your friends and see what kind of conversation comes out of it.

But anyway, he didn’t talk to the other woman and the more he ignored her, the most the woman lost interest. Once you lose one person in a set, you eventually lose them all. He did leave the set pretty quickly which was good timing.

Rian goes around and starts engaging everyone. He goes into a set, acknowledging the guy first and uses the Elvis routine.

Goes into another set and she asks a question and the woman just turns her back without saying anything. Pretty rude.

But he goes into another set. This started to bother me because he wasn’t creating any attraction here. He was just going around talking to people and then leaving after the conversation died out. Your classic case of being an open whore. This time he goes into a 6-set but that was too overwhelming. So he leaves…

Simeon has great energy. You can just feel it. It’s cool because it gives him an aura of the kind of person that you just want to know. He goes into a set and asks for a female opinion. Some douchbag screams, “shut the fuck up.” This will happen. But man, what a douche. There are so many things you could say to that, but check out what happens after. He ignores it and tries to keep going. But then he realizes that it’s not worth it. Then you notice that this girl gives him a face as he walks away. There was no reason for that. Anyone that’s her friend should be embarrassed. Someone being nice and harmless comes in and wants to start conversation and that’s how you treat them? Wow. I would love NOT to meet your friends. Tara immediately says “what a bitch.” Choice words.

So he goes into another set. He talks about maybe getting more piercings but you tell that his energy is just too high for the group he is talking to. You want to have high energy, but just a little bit more than the energy of the group. That way, you serve as somewhat of a pick me up for the group. Too high energy will come off as try-hard and a little weird.

They cut into him approaching another set and doing the spells routine. He successfully opens a 5-set and starts talking to everyone. Then one of the women in the group says, “I’m bored with this.” I wasn’t shocked at all. It wasn’t his fault. He was just getting into the wrong sets. These women were just terrible. There is a difference between being bitchy because you want to spare wasting time with a guy you’re not interested and actually being a bitch. If you were to see these interactions, you would agree with me to an extent that these women were not just acting bitchy. Tara complains again and Mystery reinforces his point of how hard us guys have it. And he’s right to a point. When you just get hit with bad vibes and people are just flat out rude, it does make things hard.

Karl He goes into a set with the spells routine. He engages the entire group but then when the conversation dies, so does he. He seems rocked by it. Tries to think of another opener but just psyches himself out.

Brian Goes into a set and does the Mick Jagger routine. “Do you think Mick Jagger is hot?” It opens up the set but he doesn’t interact with the guys.

Let me say that if you are going to go into a mixed set men and women, make sure if you are going into this set by yourself, make sure you pay respect to the men of the group. If you do that, then you don’t have to worry about them later. Some guys are actually pretty nice guys. Don’t get into that frame thinking that every guy out there that you’ll approach is going to be a douchebag. It’ll be cool. Which is why I always say, “talk to everybody.”

Then he busts out the “pickle juice” crap Matador fed him. It actually worked and that’s because Brian knew the perfect time to use it. It was well executed. You can do that with any off-the-wall comment, but you have to understand the timing and the kind of group you are talking to.

He goes into another set, does the Mick Jagger opener and then right away, introduces himself to the guy. It was perfect! Just put down all the guns pointed at you. You’ll get yourself another 2-3 minutes before those guns come back up. He’s pumping out a good vibe and just being great. He gives a high-five, grabs her hand and gives her a spin. On point. Then she gives him a hug. Why? Because she’s having a great time and she’s letting him know that. Then what does he do? He grabs her and picks her up off the floor. He’s been hanging around Matador way too much. But I do like this because it continues the playful attitude that everyone loves. He did a great job.

And I gotta say, the hair is growing on me. At first I thought it was too much but it works for him and his personality. Besides, who am I to say anything about anyone else’s hair? My hair can get out of control sometimes.

Kevin Ah, Kevin. So much potential but absolutely no experience whatsoever. He goes into a set and does the Herman routine. “Ladies, would you date a guy whose name is Herman?” It’s a fun routine to use. I would recommend using it just to be playful. The problem here is that Kevin started swearing way too much. Too, too much.

He goes into another set, doing the same routine. This time, he doesn’t interact with the guy next to him; he creeps out the women and then just goes way too fast in his conversation. Not good. He seems a little desperate and just gets too focused on the opener. Women pick this up immediately and become less attracted.

So I hope you can use this material to better analyze what you could do better while you’re out there. It’s great to be able to see these things for yourself, so be sure to look out for episodes online!

Any questions or comments are always welcome.

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